


There for you

by dude_why_3



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Hospital, Car Accidents, Eating Disorders, First Kiss, Fluff and Angst, Freeform, Friends to Lovers, Getting to Know Each Other, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Love Confessions, Medical Trauma, Memory Loss, Mentions of Cancer, Minor Character Death, Multi, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-20
Updated: 2021-02-23
Packaged: 2021-03-06 22:00:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 26
Words: 34,849
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26016160
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dude_why_3/pseuds/dude_why_3
Summary: He thought he wanted to die. That, until he woke up to a blonde girl with frozen eyes.Or how Armin Arlert ended up in a hospital due to some unfortunate events and unwillingly joined a group of crazy teenagers.
Relationships: Annie Leonhart & Annie Leonhart's Father, Armin Arlert/Annie Leonhart, Krista Lenz | Historia Reiss/Ymir, Mikasa Ackerman & Armin Arlert & Eren Yeager, Minor or Background Relationship(s), Reiner Braun & Marcel Galliard | Berwick & Porco Galliard & Bertolt Hoover & Annie Leonhart & Pieck, Sasha Blouse & Connie Springer
Comments: 115
Kudos: 168





	1. In his memory

**Author's Note:**

> So, that's my first fanfinction.
> 
> Enjoy, I guess?

Tears were running down his cheeks as he rushed to his car and jumped in, closing the door and turning the engine on with shaky hands. Armin felt the urge to leave, to go as far away as possible. So he did. Glaring one last time at the house he grew up in, he left the alley and started driving. He drove out of his back yard, past the grocery shop at the far end of the street and out of the neighbourhood.

His hands were shaking on the wheel, stinging even, blood dripping on his knee, his vision getting more blurry every second. He felt so numb and his eyelids were so heavy he thought he might fall asleep. Soon enough, Armin's hands stopped whatever they were supposed to do and he lost control of the car. His eyes got blinded by a bright light and a loud noise deafened him. He felt like he was being squeezed on something rough. And it was warm. So warm.

***

Ocean-blue eyes shut open, full of fear. Armin was met by a white ceiling and the smell of hand sanitizer.. He noticed the perfusion in his right arm and tried to raise it at eye level in order to have a better look but couldn't due to the pain. He let out a small groan as the unseen daggers stabbed his arm.

"You're up already?" He flinched at the sudden noise and turned his head in the direction it came from. 

She was beautiful. The most beautiful thing Armin had ever seen. Sitting on a chair in front of his bed, legs crossed, left hand on her tight, supporting her chin; silky-blonde hair tied back in a messy bun, stray strands perfectly framing her pale complexion, her roman nose nicely highlighted. Tiny rosy lips were forming a perfect line, icy-blue orbits pinning him down, no expression shown. He felt his face burning red, still staring at the girl beside him as she raised an eyebrow. 

"What?" she questioned in a quiet annoyed voice. 

"N-nothing!" He tried his best to sound natural, surprised at how throaty his voice was. "For how long...?"

"Almost three days" she cut him off as if knowing what he was about to ask. He closed his eyes and sighed.

"Shit."

"It could have been worse." Her voice didn't seem disturbed or annoyed anymore, just blank, neutral. "Do you have any family?" The boy opened his eyes and stared at her, not seeing how it was relevant. She sighed and dropped her hand to her side before leaning back in her chair.

"You're in a hospital" she cleared out. "You've been in a coma for almost three days thanks to a car accident and no one from your family has come to see you yet. Why? Are you an orphan or anything?"

The boy pressed his lips together. He didn't want to talk about his family. They brought him nothing but pain and he was sick of it. Also, it was pretty clear they didn't give a fig about him. He woke up from a coma to be met by a stranger instead of his own parents. Did they even notice his sudden disappearance? 

"I'm sorry" he heard the girl apologize next to him. "I shouldn't have asked that."

He turned his head to face her again and cracked a small but genuine smile.

"That's fine."

"How did you end up crashing your car, anyway?"

Ah, those so personal questions she was asking in such a natural manner you'd think they were on her daily basis.

Blurry memories crossed the boy's mind: he saw two people in what seemed to be a kitchen, their backs facing him. He tried to catch their attention, saying something about a perfect score, but it was in vain: they just kept on ignoring him. So he went in between them and grabbed the woman's elbow, only to get slapped by her fierce hand before being screamed at. 

After that, he saw a dark liquid dripping down his right wrist, a bloody blade in the other hand, a vial of pills next to him. He remembered swallowing them all down, but the pain just wouldn't go away. So he stormed out of his bathroom, grabbed his car keys, and drove away. Not long after, a bright light blinded him. Next thing he knew, he woke up in a hospital.

He decided against the idea of telling the strange girl any of this and just pretended to not remember anything. She shifted her position again, placing her leg down next to the other and crossing her arms against her large white hoodie. 

"I see." She nodded slowly, narrowing her eyes. "Anyways, I'm Annie. Annie Leonhart. You're gonna see me around pretty often during your staying here." She scratched her arm forward, waiting for him to take it. "And you?"

He smiled while taking her hand in his, feeling her surprisingly bony fingers.

"Armin. Armin Arlert."

***

"Who's the new guy?" questioned the freckled dark-skinned girl as they were approaching their usual table in the back of the cafeteria. The comic duo was already there, sharing a pizza and fooling around.

"His name is Armin," said Annie, placing her plate on the table and pulling a chair. "He claims to not remember anything" she sat down and took a bite of her cheesecake, enjoying its flavour.

"That's such a shame," the small blonde girl who took the seat in front of her shook her head slightly, probably recalling her first days here, when she couldn't remember who she was.

"The wone who got Bert's woom, 'ight?" asked the bald boy on her right, his mouth full of pizza. Annie nodded and took another bite of her meal, the latter's name echoing in her ears. 

_The one who got Bert's room_ , she thought. The image of a tall skinny black-haired boy crossed her mind, his smile as wide as ever, his green eyes full of life. Gosh, how she loved those eyes, always sparking joy; how they could calm her down and bring her to her senses no matter what. Annie shook his memory off, trying her best to remain composed, for the sake of her friends. She couldn't afford to let them see her breaking down again. She had to stay strong.

Annie sighed and turned her head away, facing the hallway. She could only hope that Armin wouldn't turn out the way their friend did.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Waking up to a stranger is not weird at all.  
> Change my mind.


	2. Get to know her

"The good part-" the orange-haired nurse pointed out "-is that your vitals are alright." She smiled at Armin, flipping the pages in her folder.

"And the bad part?"

The nurse -she said her name was Petra- furrowed her brows and let out a small sigh.

"Well, you lost a considerable amount of blood and your ribs are fractured. Moreover, your analyses showed that you took in a little too many drugs."

"Twenty-six" he heard himself saying.

"What?" Petra shook her head slightly, not understanding what her patient was speaking about.

"I took 26 pills. Antidepressants." Armin said, slightly annoyed. He was sick of their stupid tests and questions and mean doctors poking at him. He just wanted to close his eyes and never open them again.

Unfortunately, he couldn't. 

Armin watched the nurse's mouth form a perfect 'o' shape, her eyes growing wider as she digested the information. He smiled to himself for having her finally speechless.

The door suddenly opened and the small blonde girl who welcomed him the day before walked in, hands in her hoodie's pockets. 

"Annie! Good, you're here!" Petra turned to her and grinned widely, having the mentioned girl tilt her head in confusion. "Could you talk some sense in your new friend for me? I have to go check on Sasha. You know, to make sure she doesn't puck again. Thanks!" She hurried out of the room, mumbling something like _'26 pills! 26!'_ and _'he has to see Furlan, for fuck's sake! 26!?'_

Annie raised a brow as she watched the usually calm nurse storm out and shut the door.

"What did you do?" she asked as she sat on the chair in front of his bed.

"I took 26 antidepressants," said Armin, already tired of being interrogated.

She pressed her lips together and stared him dead in the eye, without saying a word. He stared back, forcing himself not to break eye contact. 

"So you tried to kill yourself. That's how you ended up crashing your car." Annie finally spoke up, still holding her gaze. He just nodded and closed his eyes.

"Why?"

"I wanted it to be over."

"You wanted what to be over?"

"Everything."

Neither one of them said anything for what seemed to be forever before Annie finally made up her mind. She stood up from her chair and walked towards him, and for the briefest second Armin thought she was gonna punch him. But then she wrapped her arms around his shoulders and hugged him.

Her weak arms felt a little strange on his shoulders, he wondered if she had any muscles at all. The scent of cherry-flowers and something like smoke invaded his nostrils.

"I'm sorry" she whispered in his ear. "I'm sorry you were driven to these kind of thoughts." 

Tears started forming in Armin's eyes, despite his struggles to keep a straight face. Annie pulled away and locked eyes with him once again, her hand on his shoulder, giving him a small smile. 

"You know you're worth it, right? Don't let anyone tell you otherwise." She told him, doing her best to stay still.

He was stunned. All he ever wanted was someone to hug him, to let him know that he wasn't nothing and now he got it -from a stranger. 

"Thanks" he muttered as he wiped his eyes with the back of his left hand's sleeve.

It was almost weird, how she was sitting there next to him, telling him gentle words as if they'd be best buddies. Like they had known each other since forever and didn't just randomly meet in a hospital. But what really confused him was why would she walk into a stranger's hospital room and wait for him to wake up? It wasn't like she had to do it or anything. 

"So, uhm..." he tried to find his words "what are you doing in a hospital?"

It probably was the rudest question he had ever asked.

Annie's eyes widened, looking angered for the briefest second before sadness took over. Armin watched her slowly getting up and sit back on the chair in front of him, avoiding his gaze. 

"N-no, I mean...! There's nothing wrong aboutyou b-beingin ahospital, it's just that-!" he blurted out, mixing words together, but Annie quickly cut him off.

"I'm sick," she said in a quiet tone.

He watched her switch her position again, leaning forward and placing her hands on her knees. Then she got up and walked to the window before leaning against the wall, her expression seeming annoyed. Then she straightened up and speed-walked to the loveseat across the room, slightly tripping on her feet, confusing Armin even more.

"Uh...are you...okay?"

"No," she said as she sat on the purple cushion. "No, I'm not okay. Would you mind if I laid here?" Annie gestured to the empty couch. 

Armin shook his head as she took her black-and-blue sneakers out and laid on her back, muttering 'thank you' before closing her eyes.

He observed her again, lying still on the purple surface, her light-blonde hair forbidding him from seeing her expression. 

"I have an ataxia." she finally said. "Loss of coordination in the arms and legs, weak muscles, vision impairment. You know. Things like this."

He didn't know, actually. It was the first time he had ever heard of this.

Annie turned her head to her side in order to face him, stray strands of hair covering her eyes, hands on her stomach. Armin blushed at how beautiful she looked and diverted his gaze, hoping she didn't notice.

"I got diagnosticated at 8 and took trips to the hospital every now and then. They're trying to find a cure for my condition, but I think it's pretty futile," she said sadly. 

Armin turned his head to face her again.

"They've been trying for a whole decade now and hadn't come up with anything." The blonde added, shrugging her shoulders. 

Annie turned on her right side with a little, unpleasant groan and tugged the stray hair behind her ear, revealing her beautiful roman nose. Armin figured she'd be quiet uncomfortable to keep talking about her disease, so he decided to change the topic.

"You're 18?" He didn't get much of an answer, just a nod. "You're older, than."

He smiled at the blonde girl in front of him.

"Really?" she tried to return the smile. 

"Yeah. I'm turning 18 only next month."

"Well, enjoy your last month of childhood. You wouldn't like being an adult." she teased.

"Talking from experience?" Armin gave her a goofy smile as she rolled her eyes.

"Are you still in high school?"

"Actually-" Armin said it full of pride "-I graduated last year."

Annie raised a brow in mocking surprise.

"And I assume you're a university student now? At Rose University?"

"The law department" he pointed out, pleasantly surprised by her knowledge. "You?"

"I graduated high school at Marly Academy last year." 

It was Armin's turn to raise an eyebrow. The Marly Academy was one of the best high schools in town and he felt kinda honoured to meet someone who had studied there.

"And what are you doing now?" 

"Recovering" she deadpanned.

 _Recovering_. Well, she surely took it too literally, right? _Right?_

"No, I mean-"

"I'm not going to any university," she said sharply, cutting him off.

His mouth formed a perfect 'o' shape and his eyes widened in surprise. Someone who studied at the most prestigious school in town was not attending any university? That was a first. 

"Then what are you doing?"

"I literally live in a hospital, Armin," she said, annoyed, narrowing her eyes.

"Oh. I'm sorry, I didn't know."

Silence took over the two of them. But it wasn't the awkward silence between two people who bearly know each other, it was a comfortable one. It also gave Annie the opportunity to switch again. She sat up and hugged her legs to her chest, placing her hands on her knees and her chin on top of them, observing Armin. 

He locked eyes with her and smiled. The crystal-like color of her orbs was the most calm and peaceful shade of blue he had ever seen. He could look into those eyes forever and not get bored, for he saw a different emotion every time. He was sure that's how the ocean must have looked like. 

"Hey, Armin?" came her soft voice.

"Yeah?"

"Don't you want to call your parents? To let them know where you are?" 

She seemed genuinely concerned. Armin pressed his lips together and started playing with his fingers.

He was definitely not looking forward to confronting them, but he knew he couldn't avoid his parents forever.

With a sigh, he looked at Annie again.

"Do you happen to have a phone?"


	3. Cigarette smoke

"That's the only one you're getting, young lady." 

Annie grinned back at her old friend and took the cigarette from between his big fingers. She lit it up and placed it between her parted lips, taking in as much smoke as she could before slowly exhaling it.

The tall muscular man leaned his back against the railing, facing the empty rooftop. He lit up his own cigarette and did the same.

"One day, these things will kill us," Reiner said, gazing at Annie.

She had her elbows on the railing, observing the town beneath them. Everything seemed so small from up there: the trees, the cars, the people. So small and peaceful.

"So be it," she answered in a quiet voice.

Reiner raised an eyebrow at his small friend. He couldn't believe how much she's changed over the years, especially in the past one. 

He could still remember the little smiley girl with bright blue eyes and two blonde ponytails who walked in the cafeteria back then. It was her first day at Saint Maria and the beginning of their long and uncommon friendship. Over the years, he had seen her falling apart and then getting up, always stronger than before. But this time was different. The unthinkable happened and it left her so broken he could bearly recognize her.

But Annie wasn't the only one who had changed. Reiner himself had given in to sorrow more times than he'd like to admit.

"I rented a new flat. And I have a spare room if you wanna get outta here." Reiner smiled in her direction. 

Annie turned her head to him and returned the smile.

"Sure."

His smile grew wilder and he scratched a hand to pat her shoulder. 

"It's gonna get better. You'll see."

The blonde nodded slightly before diverting her eyes to the streets underneath them once again.

Annie raised the cigarette to her lips again and as she was about to inhale the smoke, the image of a certain someone crossed her mind. _These things will kill us_ , she thought. 

Her hand dropped.

"There's a new kid on our floor." she finally spoke up, locking eyes with her former 'neighbor'.

Reiner raised an eyebrow at her sudden statement.

"He got Bert's room."

***

After running down the stairs to her floor, Annie had to stop and lean on the wall at the far end of the corridor to catch her breath. Her muscles were aching so bad she thought she might collapse, her heart beating faster than ever, her bangs sticking to her forehead.

That damn Reiner. Challenging a sick stubborn girl to a race.

Her eyes instinctively flew to the door 3 blocks ahead, on the right side of the corridor. That common, wooden door which hid thousands and thousands of memories. The door to his bay.

Annie shut her eyes closed, biting her lower lip and digging her nails in her palm.

_Stop it, stop it, stop it, you can't cry, you can't do this here, not now, stop it, you useless-_

The click of the door being opened made her flinch. She opened her eyes cautiously and saw the silhouettes of two blonde people. 

_His parents_ , she thought. 

Annie watched them take a few steps down the hall before the woman broke down. She raised her arms to her face, trying to contain her sobs, as her husband wrapped his arms around her and held her close. 

Annie remained still in her spot, observing the scene taking place before her eyes. 

She was there when Armin called home and told his parents where he was and she heard his mother panic at the other end as her son was trying to assure her. And she felt _jealous_.

She felt jealous because _her_ parents weren't there. Because when she needed them the most, they... _vanished_. Because Armin had something she didn't.

Annie waited until the two blondes were long gone before knocking twice on his door and sticking her head in.

The blonde boy was sitting on his bed, wearing a brand-new blue T-shirt, a white blanket on his legs. He had his hands in his lap and head down, his eyes curtained by his golden hair. On the little nightstand beside his bed were some books, an opened bag of cookies, and a cellphone, neither of which were there before. 

"May I?" said Annie, giving a small smile.

Armin's head snapped up and she saw his ocean-blue eyes drowned in tears. He quickly raised his healthy hand to wipe them away and tried to smile.

"A-Annie! You're here." his voice sounded throaty.

She stepped inside, closing the door before she walked to him and sat on the edge of the bed. 

"Need a hug?" she offered. 

Armin nodded reluctantly. So she wrapped her arms around his neck and dragged him closer to her.

She knew how much he needed to know that he wasn't alone. She also knew all the comfort in the world wouldn't be enough to fix the damage, but she still had to try. Only this time harder.

She felt a hesitant hand touch her shoulderblade. Seconds later, the blond boy in her arms buried his face in the crook of her neck and started sobbing.

Annie placed her chin on top of his head and raised a hand to stroke his hair, running circles on his back with the other.

"I'm s-sorry-" _sob_ "-I'm-" _hiccup_ "-so-sorry!" came Armin's muffled voice. 

Annie's hand on his back stopped responding. She wished he wouldn't notice the slight tremble.

"It's okay," she whispered in his ear.

The boy pulled away just before her hands dropped and wiped his tears. She gave him a small smile.

"My parents came," Armin said in a low voice. 

Annie took his right hand in her still working one and inspected the bandages going up his arm to the elbow.

"And?" she slowly interlaced her fingers with his.

"They apologized." Armin leaned his head against the wall. "For the first time in forever."

He turned his head to look at her. She had begun playing with his fingers, a small blush flashing her face. Her icy-blue eyes were down, looking at his injured hand. Stray strands of lemon hair were sticking out of her bun, some of which framing her pale complexion. And she looked beautiful. 

"Annie?" she raised her head and faced him, smiling. "Your fingers are shaking."

Her blush spread across her face and she quickly retreated her hand, mumbling an apology. Armin stretched his own forward, interlacing their fingers once again. 

"Are you smoking?" he heard himself ask and he mentally facepalmed himself afterward.

Annie's brows furrowed and she diverted her eyes.

"N-no! I mean-!"

"Once a week." she deadpanned.

His eyes grew wider and he stared at her. He expected to get punched for asking such a rude question. But he was wrong again.

"Why just once?" 

Annie looked at him again.

"We're not allowed to have cigarettes in here, so I'm borrowing them from a friend when he comes to visit," she said, shrugging her shoulders. 

Armin nodded and looked down at their tangled fingers. He had unconsciously started to rub circles on her knuckles with his thumb, but since Annie didn't complain about it he kept doing so.

Silence took over the two blondes. 

Annie inspected his features: his golden bowl-cut, his small button nose, his ocean-blue eyes. The red mark on his cheek.

 _Wait, a mark?_ She looked at it with wide eyes, wondering how he got it. She was almost sure he didn't have it the day before. _Only if..._

"And why are you smoking?" the boy asked, cutting the silence and raising his head to face her.

"Why are you cutting?" Annie blurted out sharply. 

His eyes widened and he looked away, biting his lips. _Why_ was he cutting?

"Sorry. I shouldn't have asked that." said the blonde girl, wishing her other hand wouldn't be asleep so she could stroke his cheek.

Armin remained quiet and he slowly pulled his hand away, placing it in his lap. He was looking at the wall before his eyes as if he expected a _demogorgon_ to get out of it. 

"I know." Annie sat up, hit by an idea. "Let's get you out of here. This place is depressing."

The boy turned his head to look at her face.

"Where?"

She smiled and took both his hands to help him stand up.

"The cafeteria. I want you to meet some people."

***

Everyone greeted Reiner with open arms when he entered the cafeteria. He found his friends at their usual table in the back of the enormous hall and sat with them.

"How's the outside life, big guy?" asked Connie, the comic bald guy.

"Better, I guess." he shrugged his shoulders.

He watched Sasha battle the urge to eat a whole bowl of tomato soup from across the table. She would approach the food with the spoon, a huge grin on her face, only to reconsider it and draw back. She did this a couple of times before Ymir decided she had had enough and aggressively stuffed a loaf of bread in the ponytailed girl's mouth.

"Ymir!" the golden-haired girl next to Reiner scolded in a pinched voice. The freckled girl across the table stuck her tongue out.

The young man leaned back in his chair as Connie commented something about how Sasha would throw up later anyway. The ginger protested, trying to convince the other that she was doing fine and was perfectly healthy. Her baldy rolled his eyes playfully before giving her a mocking grin and carried on with his jokes.

In the meantime, Christa was busy lecturing her girlfriend on forcing food into a sick person's mouth while the other was just scrolling on her phone, nodding every now and then. 

Reiner smirked as he watched his friends being their usual selves. He did miss spending every day with them, after all.

In the corner of his eye, Reiner caught a short blonde girl with a white hoodie pushing a wheelchair in the cafeteria. He observed the person in the wheelchair: a seemingly young boy with golden hair and a stupid haircut, his head lifted upward so he could somehow face Annie. They stopped by the snack bar to buy some soda and he saw Annie point at some cake and explaining something to the invalid boy.

But what amazed Reiner was the fact that, since entering the mass hall, his friend hasn't stopped smiling.


	4. Meet the crew

Armin's torso was still hurting. Maybe not as much as ten minutes ago, but it still hurt. 

Annie had tried to lift him up and drag him out of bed, but as soon as he got to his own feet a sharp pain took over his upper body.

His legs collided and he lost his balance. In an attempt to catch him, Annie lost her balance too, her muscles were like _'nope, we're not doing this today'_.

So the two of them ended up on the floor, Armin on top of Annie, an unpleasant groan leaving the latter. 

"The fuck, Arlert." she barked, trying to push him away.

He tried his best to stand up, but the pain wouldn't let him. So he just rolled on one side.

"Sorry. My ribs-" he was cut off by a coughing Annie.

Panicked, Armin turned to her, trying to ignore the pain. She had curled on the floor, her back facing him, hands covering her mouth.

"Annie?" he sounded more panicked than he had planned to. He stretched a hand, trying to stroke her shoulder, but he couldn't reach her so he helplessly watched her coughing her lungs out.

Seconds later, the blonde girl rolled over and faced him, her complexion paler than before.

"Sorry for having you panic," she said, smirking.

Annie slowly got up and called nurse Ral. After the ginger had entered the room with some other nurse, Armin was lifted up from the floor and placed in a wheelchair. Petra gave him some painkillers ( _"Don't get too used to them, you're not getting more."_ ) and a lecture for trying to get up so soon ( _"What were you thinking?!"_ ). Armin opened his mouth to protest, but seeing the apologetic look Annie was giving him behind the nurse, he decided not to turn her in. 

So there they were, ten minutes later, buying coke and muffins instead of actual food because none of them could carry it.

"You know that's not an actual meal, right?" a manly voice said from behind, making Armin flinch.

Annie rolled her eyes and turned to face the tall muscular blonde man who had approached them. He had a playful smirk on his face.

"I'm starving," Annie said with a straight face.

They seemed to have some kind of unspoken argument before Annie eventually sighed. 

She turned to Armin and asked what he wanted to eat. He shrugged and let her decide for him since she knew what was better.

She bought a potato pie for him and some mac& cheese for herself. The other man offered to carry their plates and they began walking ( _or being pushed_ ) again.

"Did I tell you that Pieck's here too?" the young man asked, looking at Annie, who raised an eyebrow. 

"What did she do this time?"

"Broke a leg."

"Again?" Annie sounded quite bored while saying this as if she was expecting it.

"Again." the other confirmed.

 _So they know each other_ , Armin thought. 

"You're the newby, right?" the guy said, this time addressing the one in the wheelchair. 

"Y-yes. Armin," he said, extending his healthy arm to shake hands before realizing the other's hands were occupied. He left his hand down, embarrassed. 

"I'm Reiner, Annie's big brother." the other said with a grin.

Oh.

"Well, you do look alike" Armin tried to compliment him. 

Reiner burst out laughing as Annie playfully punched him in the stomach (since she couldn't reach his face). Armin looked at them confused and raised a questioning brow at Annie.

"We're not related," she said. "It's just one of Reiner's stupid jokes." she narrowed her eyes at him while saying that.

_Oh._

Before he noticed, they had reached the far end of the mass hall, where four other teenagers were chatting at the only taken table. _A table of ten._

Reiner placed their plates on the table and caught the others' attention.

"Yeah, so, this is Armin, the new guy on our floor. So, I don't know, be nice and try to make him feel comfortable."

The freckled girl with a low ponytail and tanned complexion smirked, still scrolling on her phone.

"You say _our floor_ like you'd still live here."

"Ymir!" the blonde girl across the table scolded.

Armin could see Annie smile as she pushed him closer to the table. She "parked" him on the right side of the table and sat next to him, across from Reiner.

"Is that potato pie you have there?!" the ponytailed girl two seats from him asked, happiness could be read in her eyes.

"Yes?"

"Sasha, no." the bald guy with hazel eyes in front of her said. "You had potatoes yesterday."

"But-!"

"You don't wanna disappoint that monkey, right?" he teased.

"...no" Sasha dropped her head, looking somehow sad, and took a spoon of her tomato soup.

"Where are Marco and Mina?" Annie asked the girl next to her. Ymir?

The other didn't stop looking at her phone.

"Marco's probably fucking his boyfriend while Mina's burning in jealousy," she said with a straight face. 

Armin tried to contain his sneaker. 

"Ymir!" the blonde fairy scolded again.

The latter rolled her eyes and kept on scrolling.

During their lunch, Armin found out that Reiner was actually a cancer survivor who kept on visiting his hospital friends once a week while Connie -the bald guy- was still fighting his liver-cancer. Sasha, the girl who asked about the potato pie, turned out to be bulimic, despite her seemingly huge appetite ( _"Don't let her fool you, she'll try to throw up as soon as she gets rid of us" Connie had said, making his bestie pout_ ).

The blonde fairy who called herself Christa Lenz had lost her memories in a car accident half a year before and was currently dating Ymir, the girl always on her phone. She refused to share her story and left the others half-way through their meal with a quiet annoyed Christa at her back.

"They're a weird couple," Reiner said, taking a sip of his bitter coffee.

"Can you blame them?" Connie asked, without expecting an answer since he turned his attention to Armin. "You better not mess with them, that Ymir is _dangerous_ ," he said, widening his eyes at the last word.

"You're scaring him" Annie deadpaned.

"If you say so, nosey" the bald one teased, earning a glare. 

Sasha chuckled in her spot.

"Well, I'd better get going," Connie said after checking his phone. " _Mamá_ will be here any moment." 

He sat up, hugged Sasha, nodded at Annie, shook hands with Reiner, and patted Armin's back.

"Don't worry, blondy, you'll fit in just fine. And by next week, I promise you're gonna have a new nickname."

The boy gave him a goofy smile and waved goodbye before leaving the cafeteria and fading away.

Armin looked at his fading silhouette and smiled. Next to him, the other 3 friends were chatting casually about the latest episode of their favourite show. As if they wouldn't be in a hospital.

And that's when it hit him: those people were each fighting to take their lives back, trying to live it to the fullest. Even if that meant sneaking into a stranger's room and watching him sleep.


	5. Talk

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ookay, here comes the fluff (* >ω<)

"I hate this schedule," Sasha said while entering the elevator. 

They had finished their meal and Reiner had excused himself, saying he needed to be home early, so the three of them decided to head to their rooms.

Annie pressed the button to their floor and leaned against the wall, facing her friend.

"I mean-" Sasha carried on "-I'm fine. I'm healed. There's no reason for me to stay here anymore, much less stick to their program."

Armin watched the ginger girl drop her head and sigh dramatically. Annie rolled her eyes. 

"Maybe Zeke just doesn't want to risk losing another patient so he's become more strict," she said quietly.

Sasha nodded and straightened up. She was determined to get back to normal and leave this place as soon as possible.

She turned her head to Armin, who was sitting in his chair in a corner and smiled wildly.

"So, Armin, how did you end up in the E.D. section?"

"The what?"

"The eating disorder section. There are two sections on our floor, the cancer one, and the eating disorder one. And you're on the E.D. corridor."

Armin looked at her with widened eyes, puzzled. He had no idea what she was talking about, much less how to respond. 

"I see," Sasha said, tilting her head a bit. Then, with more enthusiasm: "How did you crash your car?"

 _How does she know this?_ His eyes flew on Annie, who diverted her gaze from him and bit her lower lip.

He let his eyes down and tried to come up with an excuse, but his mind was not working right. _I tried to kill myself_ sounded like the most plausible reason, but he couldn't tell anyone about it. It was too personal, too close to home.

He opened his mouth to say something when Annie cut him off.

"Give him a break, you're tiring him up."

Perfect timing. The elevator stopped with a horrible sound and the doors opened soon after. Sasha waved her goodbyes and disappeared behind a corner, leaving the two blondes alone.

Annie straightened up from her spot and began rolling Armin's wheelchair once again. She mumbled an apology he responded at with a slight nod.

The walk back to his bay was quiet, which gave Armin time to think things over. As far as he knew, Annie had an ataxia. And from his research the night before, he found out that an ataxia was a rare genetic disease that caused difficulty walking, a loss of sensation in the arms and legs, and impaired speech as well as damage to parts of the brain and spinal cord and could also affect the heart.

Annie did show some of the signs, such as weak limbs and walking issues. But-

"Armin" a soft touch on his shoulder woke Armin from his thoughts. He looked around and noticed that they had actually reached his bay.

Annie was standing next to him, looking somehow exhausted, a small smile on her face. 

"I'm not sure I can get you in bed," she said quietly.

Armin smiled back and took her hand in his, making her flinch slightly. 

"That's fine. Thank you, Annie." Armin said. He raised her hand to his lips and gently kissed her knuckles, just like Grandpa used to do with his wife.

Annie's eyes widened and she hurried to turn her head away so Armin wouldn't see the spreading blush in her cheeks. It's been so long since someone had shown her affection she could barely remember it.

She recalled how her father would pat her head every time she did well in a competition. He'd stroke her lemon hair and offer her a smile, as well as a _'good job, I'm proud of you'_. Little Annie loved seeing her father happy and would do anything so he'd be proud of her. But once she got sick-

Annie shook the memory off. She was _much_ better on her own, without anyone to order her around.

She slowly retreated her hand from Armin's and fully turned away.

"I should go and take my medicine," she said.

"Can't we talk a little?" he pleaded, watching her back.

Annie shook her head and tried to make a few steps towards the door, but her legs just wouldn't help her. Her incapacity to use her limbs gave Armin the perfect chance to grab her wrist and drag her closer. 

"Maybe you should rest a little" he suggested.

Annie tried to walk away again, but she failed. _Again_. She sighed and gave in.

"Fine."

She let Armin's hand guide her to the bed a few steps ahead and sat down. She felt relieved as soon as she touched the soft mattress.

Armin rolled his chair closer to the bed and Annie helped him sit down.

"I wanted to ask you for a while-" Armin began saying "-why were you here when I woke up?"

Annie crossed her legs and placed an arm on her tight so she could support her chin.

"I was waiting for you to come to your senses."

"But you didn't even know me."

"That's right." Annie turned her head to face him and locked eyes with him. "But you were alone."

Her eyes narrowed when she saw the confused look on his face.

" _No one_ should _ever_ wake up alone from a coma," she added in a serious voice.

Armin's eyes widened. The way she said it made it seem like she knew how it was to wake up alone. Which only raised more questions for Armin.

"Annie, you're actually ... a kind person, aren't you?"

_"Huh?"_

Armin gave her a genuine smile, and it was Annie's turn to be confused.

"You looked after me and treated me like a friend when you barely knew me. And you were there for me when no one else would." 

Annie looked at him with big eyes and red cheeks. 

"And-" Armin carried on with flushed cheeks and raising emotion in his eyes "-I'm grateful for everything."

"Armin."

"And I'm willing to be there for you too."

He stretched his hand forward and interlaced his fingers with hers, stroking her knuckles. 

"Armin," she said again, in a much lower voice.

He raised his other hand too and softly placed it on her smooth cheek. He smiled gently while caressing her skin with his fingertips.

"Armin, stop that" she whispered, feeling her eyes burning in tears.

"It's okay, Annie," he wiped the tear going down her cheek with the back of his palm. "You can let it out if you want to."

And that's what she did. She buried her face in his chest and cried. In fact, if it wasn't for his shirt going wet, Armin wouldn't have even known she was crying. She did it so quietly like she had trained herself to make as less sound as possible. 

He held her close and stroke her lemon hair, drawing circles on her back. And he let her cry until she felt better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also, if you haven't noticed already, I'm not a native speaker, so some of the words might be spelled wrong and others might not even exist ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
> 
> But I'm trying! I'm actually doing my best!


	6. Reminder

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guess who's showing up.

It was 7.46 on a Monday morning. The building was dead asleep, each patient in their own dreams when the loudest ringtone ever decided to get heard. And it came from Armin's bay. 

He lazily stretched his hand out of the cover and reached for the phone, his head buried in the pillow. He answered it and placed the phone next to his ear.

That's all his friend needed.

"Ye-"

"Where on earth are you?!" he heard Eren yell.

"I-"

"Do you realize it's 8 in the goddamn morning?! Our project-"

"Eren"

"It's due to fucking now!"

"Okay, list-"

"So get your ass up from whatever chick's bed and _**get here already**_!"

"Eren, I'm in the hospital!" Armin heard himself yell. A distant cry in the distance assured him that, yes, he had woken up everyone.

For a couple of seconds, his loud-mouthed friend went silent. Then-

"You're _what_?!"

It took Armin ten minutes to tell his friend the whole story, making sure to let out his failed attempt and the events causing it. The last thing he needed was the whole school talking about his suicidal thoughts.

Fortunately, his childhood friend bought the lie.

"Geez, Armin. I'm so sorry for you. Why haven't you called earlier and let us know?"

_I don't know, maybe because you never listen?_

"I didn't want to worry you" he lied.

He heard shuffling at the other end. 

"Uh, Dok's early today" Eren mumbled in the phone. "We'll come and visit later today-"

"Eren, no-"

"So take it easy, okay? Mika and I will fight the boredom of the hospital!"

"Eren-"

He hanged up.

Great.

_Thanks for listening, Eren._

Armin closed his eyes and was ready to go back to sleep when he heard the door open. He let an exhausted sigh out and turned to the person in the doorframe.

"You just woke up the whole building."

Of course it couldn't go past Annie's ears.

Standing in the doorframe with her hair down and a green night-dress on, the blonde girl was scanning him with her blue orbs. And she looked beautiful. 

Armin sighed again and rolled on his back.

"Sorry."

Annie flashed a smile and slowly walked towards him. She sat down on the edge of the bed and Armin made room under the covers for her.

"You sure that's fine?" Annie curled herself up next to him under the blanket and faced him.

"Why wouldn't it be?" Armin smiled while tugging a stray strand of lemon hair behind her ear.

"If nurse Ral finds us like that _again_..."

(Just imagine what was in Petra's mouth when she walked in the 84th bay to give her patient the medicine to find him cuddled in bed with the most stoic girl she had ever known. _Both sound asleep_. Just. Imagine. It.)

Armin shrugged his shoulders. 

"What could she do about it? It's not like we're making out or anything."

"Armin!" Annie turned red, her eyes big as onions.

"Unless..." he teased, a playful smirk on his face. 

She pulled his nose, her lips lifted upwards.

"Did your friends call?" she randomly said.

"Yeah" he rolled his eyes.

"You're so lucky, you know? You have so many people around you that care about you," she said sadly.

Armin pressed his lips together. No, he wasn't lucky. It was true that he had a lot of people around him, but it wasn't like they gave a fig about him. His parents only cared about his grades and the way he would show off to others, so they'd praise them for having the perfect son, while his friends would only turn to him when they needed something. But when _he_ needed support? There was no one there for him. He had to deal with his problems all by himself.

"No," he mumbled "I'm not."

"Armin, you're parents are _visiting_ you," she said in a quite annoyed voice. 

"But they don't care," he said. "Mom even slapped me for crashing her goddam car!" 

Annie's eyes widened and she went silent. So that was the thing about his red mark on his cheek the other day. Her son had almost died and all she cared about was a _car_?!

"Unbelieveable" she muttered. 

"Yeah" he agreed. "How are your parents? I take they were always there, right?"

Annie narrowed her eyes and pressed her lips together. There was no way she was going to tell him about her home life. But she owed him that much.

"They...weren't. In fact, I don't know where they are," she admitted, shrugging her shoulders.

Armin raised an eyebrow. Truth be told, he never saw it coming. He thought Annie had had the perfect upbringing, with both her parents showering her in love. It seems like he misunderstood it.

"I'm sorry, Annie. I thought-" he brought his hand to her cheek "-It doesn't matter what I thought, actually. I'm-"

"What's your favourite color?" Annie cut him off.

" _Huh_?"

"What's your favourite color?" she asked again.

It was a half-assed attempt to change the topic, but Armin was slowly getting it. She didn't want to talk about her past and he had to roll with it.

"Blue," he said, playing her game.

"What kind of blue?"

"Crystal-like blue. Like the morning sky, actually. It's so calm and relaxing and it hides so much without actually hiding anything."

 _Just like your eyes_ , he thought. 

Annie raised an eyebrow at his explanation. It did fit him, after all. A calm color for a calm person.

"What about you? What's your favourite color?" he asked, smiling.

"White, I guess," Annie answered after a moment of thinking. "I like that it's neutral" she added hurriedly.

Armin saw the hesitation in her eyes and noticed her small tremble.

"Annie, I think-" he started to say.

"What's your favourite animal?" she cut him off once again.

Well, now it was clear as crystal that she was trying to avoid something. 

"Ducks," he blurted out.

" _Ducks_ " Annie repeated with a cocked brow.

"Yes. Because they're small and cute and yellow and- oh my God, Annie!"

"What?" she looked kinda panicked at his reaction.

"You're a duck!" he exclaimed playfully.

Annie turned fifty shades of red.

She jumped up and stormed out of his room, then ran down the hall to her bay. She shut the door closed before collapsing on the floor, trying to catch her breath. She leaned her head against the wooden door and closed her eyes. 

_"You're a duck!"_ she heard Armin say again. 

She smiled to herself. _They're small and cute and yellow,_ she remembered. And he had compared her to a _duck._

_Which means he thinks I'm cute...?_

Annie burst out laughing only to slap her mouth after two seconds.

 _No. Armin would never look at someone like you_ , she thought. _No one would. You're just a stupid piece of-_

Her thoughts were interrupted by the ring of her phone. Who on earth would send her a text at 8 in the morning?

She slowly got up and walked to the nightstand next to her bed, where her phone was. Her blue orbs widened when she saw the ID. _**He**_ was the last person she needed now.

__**[Where on earth are you, Annie?!]**_ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> （・◇・）
> 
> Also, I think I left an open question in the last chapter: _What's Armin doing in the E.D. section?_
> 
> And here's the answer: it was the only spare room in the entire hospital. Besides, I kind of used that part to give away a clue about Bert's condition.


	7. Visit

"So, here are the courses for the last week. At least, I hope they are." Eren said, rubbing the back of his head.

He and Mikasa had come to visit an hour ago and they kept fussing around him -mostly Eren- and making sure he was okay. Eren had asked him to tell them what happened _three_ times before Mikasa eventually stepped in and made him stop. Which he was grateful for since he was beginning to forget the lie he had told them.

Then, they started to put him up to the latest news: Dok was even a bigger asshole than they originally thought, for he had marked Eren absent even though he was _in the class_ , that horse-face wouldn't stop getting on Eren's nerves, for he had turned him in for peaking an eye in the open book during a test, Floch started to worship Eren after the loud-mouth stood up for himself against mister Pixis and got a detention, and, oh, the principal's eyebrows measured exactly three centimeters. Marlo had confirmed it on Friday.

"And-" Eren added with enthusiasm "-guess who's cousin has a girlfriend?"

Mikasa rolled her gray eyes, her lips lifted upwards.

"It's just an assumption, Eren," she said.

"Wait" the blond looked at them with wide eyes. "Levi? _With a woman?_ "

Eren grinned widely, his green eyes sparkling joy.

"I know, right? Who would have thought?"

Well, surely not him. As much as he was concerned, Levi was the kind of person who hardly ever showed any emotion. The thought of him dating someone seemed _impossible_.

"She's a nurse here," Mikasa said, shrugging her shoulders.

"Really?" he turned his head in her direction.

"Yeah. Short-shorter than him, actually-, orange hair-"

"No way!" Armin exclaimed.

Seeing the puzzled looks his friends were giving him, he explained that nurse Ral-or Petra- was actually one of the nurses responsible for his section.

"We saw them together when we arrived-" Eren cleared up "-making out in the hallway," he added with a smirk.

"No way," Armin said in disbelief.

"Yes way," his friend said. "And they seemed really into it."

Armin made a face. He just couldn't imagine that man making out with anyone-for he seemed to be a workaholic and barely ever seemed to have time for anything but his projects- especially not with Petra. Well, they were both dedicated- _too_ dedicated- to their work, so they _did_ have something in common.

"We should go now, Eren," Mikasa said after checking her phone. "Your mom wants you home early."

Eren sighed dramatically and got up from his chair. Mikasa stood up as well.

"You're going already?" Armin said, saddened.

"Yeah," his friend said, her brows furrowed. "We kinda have to."

"But we'll come again tomorrow!" the dark-haired boy added hurriedly, putting his greenish coat on.

Armin smiled at them and gave a small wave as they were leaving his bay. He did miss his friends, after all. He missed talking about classes and teachers and casual stuff university students talk about.

***

That evening, Armin had decided to go and have dinner in the mass hall, despite nurse Ral offering to bring his food in his room. He could very well take care of himself. Besides, he wanted to see Annie, since she didn't show up that day, after the duck incident. He felt the need to apologize.

He planned to go and sit on his own at one of the single tables, but it didn't quite work out. Connie and Sasha noticed him when he got into the cafeteria and insisted that he stayed with them. Connie even offered to carry his plate.

"I can do it myself, ya know," Armin said, irritated.

Connie gave him a goofy smile.

"I know. I just - Sasha, _**no**_ , you can't have potatoes today! - want to help as much as I can."

Armin eventually gave in and, pouting, he let the bald boy help him. Sasha agreed to get some boiled vegetables and they proceeded to go to their table in the back of the mass hall.

Christa and Ymir were already there, chatting casually while holding hands, along with two more people: a girl with black shoulder-length hair tied back in two low piggy tails and some wires going out of her nose, engaged in a conversation with some boy with freckles all over his face which had some weird stitches along his jawline and on his temples. But there was no Annie at the table.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm just gonna live this here and vanish for the next couple of weeks since school starts tomorrow. Which means you can expect slower updates from now on (p_q)


	8. Therapy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Remember when I said I was gonna vanish? Well, guess what. Not yet.

"Okay, kid-" the therapist said sitting down, Armin's files in his hands "-here are your test results." 

The blond boy raised his hands in mocking excitement, but he was sure his eyes could tell: he was done with this.

"And you're not that healthy," the man said, rubbing the back of his neck.

"I know, doc. I tried to kill myself. There was no doubt I was mentally ill." 

Armin was growing more annoyed every second.

Mister Church sighed. This was the most difficult patient he had had in a while. It almost reminded him of a stubborn young lady with straight long black hair who had been in the very same situation as Armin. Dead purple-ish eyes crossed his mind and her image woke bad memories. He had sworn to never let anyone end up like her. He'd do everything in his power to stop young people from ending their lives and help them heal. And he hoped that way he would make it up to her for failing to help her.

"And how do you feel about that?"

"About trying to take my life or about failing and waking up here?" 

"The second part."

Armin took a shaky breath, thinking about what he was about to say. 

"I was...disappointed, at first. I had wished to vanish so much that...the-the thought of just being alive was... disturbing, somehow." 

He lowered his head and looked at the damned bandage around his arm. Yes, he was disappointed that he failed. But then he met Annie and Connie and Sasha and the others and realized that being alive wasn't that bad.

He let out a small chuckle.

"And then Annie walked into my bay and introduced me to her friends and... I realized that there is _so much more_ to being alive than I originally thought. And I think...I think I didn't actually want to die. Ever."

"Really?" the therapist raised an eyebrow. "And still, you attempted."

"I think... I just wanted life as I knew it to end. I wanted the pain to go away. I wanted to get rid of it." Armin blurted out. Then, in a lower voice: "Because I didn't see any other path, I thought that was the only way to break free. And now I understand how wrong I was." He looked away and rubbed the back of his neck. "And I'm grateful I'm still alive."

The doctor smiled gently and patted his shoulder. 

"I'm happy to hear that," he said.

"Yeah."

He should thank Annie, after all. For bringing him to his senses. For showing him how rare and beautiful it really is to even exist.

He wondered what she was doing right now. He hasn't seen her in a week, since _the duck_ incident. She stopped visiting him and wouldn't even show up in the mass hall. Like she was avoiding him on purpose.

"You know-" mister Church said, "-when I first met Annie, she was no different from you."

Armin's eyes widened at the statement. 

"So hearing you say she helped you is somehow uplifting."

Armin lifted his head to face the doctor.

"What had happened to her?"

"That's confidential," the doctor said, raising a hand as if to show he made a promise. "It's her choice whether to tell you or not."

Armin pressed his lips together. _She was no different from you_. It somehow rang a bell in his mind. 

It all made sense now. The way she'd try to make him feel better and support him whenever he'd be down, the gentle hugs she'd give him, the kind words. 

As if she'd know exactly how to treat someone who wanted to end it all. As if she knew exactly how he felt like.

Her waiting for him to wake up because _no one should ever wake up alone from a coma_. The way she broke down when he showed her affection. 

As if she wasn't used to being cared for. 

_Was she abused as a child?_

She did act like someone who grew up lonely. Like someone who was used to being independent and taking care of herself.

Well, the best way to find out was to ask her, right?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it's short and I'm sorry.
> 
> I also know it's sad. And I'm sorry. But when I started to write this, one of my goals was to show the effects of trauma: it can either make you shut down in yourself or explode. You can either respond to it by becoming stronger or destroying yourself. But just know that there are better ways of handling the pain than what Armin's doing.


	9. Incoming call

She had avoided him for an entire week. In fact, she had avoided pretty much everyone. She'd barely even leave her room. She asked nurse Magnolia to bring her meals in her bay and even dismissed her physical therapy, calling in ill. 

Truth be told, she was scared. She was _frightened_. She'd run to the window every time she heard a car's engine and flinch whenever someone would open her door. 

She hadn't felt this helpless in a lot of time and would have liked it if she never had to go through this again.

But it couldn't be avoided. 

Her father kept on sending her texts and even called her. She ignored all his attempts to reach out, but she was growing more fearful every time.

He tried to tell her how much he had changed and how sorry he was for treating her like crap in the past, but she just couldn't trust him. 

She had too many wounds, and most of them were still open. She needed more time to heal.

"You're overreacting," Reiner said over the phone after she was done telling him the whole thing.

His words only annoyed her more.

"I mean-" he carried on "-he's trying to fix your relationship. Maybe you should give him a chance."

"After what happened last time? No way."

She didn't actually remember the events that clearly. Maybe because she was left unconscious.

"Maybe he had truly changed, Annie."

"He changed, my foot," she barked. 

She could almost feel her torso aching from his punches. She remembered the blood going up her throat and her vision going blurry. She remembered hearing the door open as someone was yelling her name before she collapsed. And when she woke up -nothing was the same.

Two knocks on her wooden door made her flinch. Her eyes widened and her heart started racing. Her fingers were suddenly trembling as a million thoughts crossed her mind.

She tried to ignore it, thinking that maybe the person would go away.

"Annie?" she heard Reiner call her name.

"He's here," she whispered as she slowly sat up from her bed.

" _What?!_ " Reiner sounded more panicked than ever.

Annie hung up and unconsciously dropped her phone.

"Annie? Are you there?" a low voice came from the other side of the door.

She was badly trembling now. 

_He is here, he found me, holy cat, he's here._

She took a few steps towards the window and grabbed the frame with shaky hands. She started taking in hurried breaths, her heart almost jumping from her chest. 

She had to escape, she had to get out-

_Too late._

The door opened slightly with a rusty creak and she saw the shadow of his cane. She shut her blue orbs closed and bit her lower lip, waiting for the worst to happen. That was it. She was done for. God, have mercy.

"Annie?" a soft and familiar voice asked.

She slowly opened her eyes and saw his golden shoulder-length hair and baby-blue eyes. 

In the door-frame was standing none other than Armin Arlert, now out of his wheelchair. He had a slight smile on his face.

He had crutches to help him walk and the bandages around his arm were still there, but he seemed fine.

Annie exhaled a sigh of relief. _It's just him_.

"May I come in?" he asked. 

She nodded slightly and went to sit on the white sheets of her bed, trying to calm herself down.

 _It's fine, Annie. It's just your friend Armin. Randomly showing up at your door when you haven't even told him where your bay is_.

_Well, now she was even more panicked. How did he know where her bay was?_

Armin closed the door behind him and walked towards her. He slowly sat beside her, putting his crutches down on the floor.

"How did you know where to find me?" Annie asked in a low voice, her eyes down, hair curtaining her face. She tried to hug herself, hoping he'd just think she's cold instead of terrified. 

"I asked Connie," he said, a curious look on his face.

"Shit."

"Huh? Why? You didn't want to see me?" he tilted his head, searching for her eyes.

She brought her right hand up to her face and covered it, closing her eyes as she shook her head. 

_If it was that easy for you to find me, then-_

_No, don't. Don't you dare think about that._

_He won't find me, right? The staff wouldn't allow it to happen, right??_

_Even if he does-_

**_But he won't._ **

"Annie?" Armin placed his palm on her shoulderblade, making her flinch. "Are okay, Annie?"

She lifted her head and looked him in the eye. She looked miserable. 

"No," she admitted in a whisper.

Armin tried to smile at her. He hasn't seen her so done and tired before. But what concerned him was not only the desperate look in her icy-blue eyes, but the bags under them. She looked like she hasn't slept in days.

So he did the only thing his brain could come up as a solution at that moment: he hugged her. He put his hands around her petite frame and held her to his chest, stroking her light-blonde hair.

"Do you want to talk about it or be distracted from it?" he asked in a calm voice.

"The second part," she muttered. 

Armin thought about something common he could tell her.

"I started attending classes online since I have to stay here for the next few months. My school gave me this alternative so I won't fall behind in class."

"What will you do after graduation?" Annie asked in a low voice.

"Become a lawyer and help the innocent," he said. Then, he remembered something and added: "But first, I want to see the ocean."

"Hm?..."

Annie lifted her head up and looked at his face. His eyes were now sparkling joy, as if the thought of the ocean brought the life back in them.

"I want to see the ocean," Arin mused. "You know, when I was little, I would spend most of my time in my grandfather's library. He loved books, so he had a large and impressive collection.

"Since my parents would often be gone for work, I spent most of my childhood there, reading whatever I wanted. And one day I came across that one book about the wonders of the world we leave in." 

Armin peered a look down, wanting to see the state Annie was in. She was still trembling slightly, but her face looked somehow more relaxed. He carried on with his story.

"I read it immediately and absolutely loved it. Fire water, land made of ice, fields of sand. And the ocean. An enormous body of saltwater-" he smiled recalling the words written in his grandfather's book "-so much salt that the merchants could try to sell it their entire lives and it will still not run out."

Annie watched him talk about the outside world with wide eyes. She saw the excitement and happiness in his eyes and couldn't help but smile. 

He was such a lovely boy and he had such beautiful dreams. And he seemed so fragile she felt the need to protect him.

"I know!" he exclaimed, catching her attention. 

She looked at him with a croocked eyebrow. 

"Let's go and see the ocean together." He smiled widely. "We don't have to wait until graduation. As soon as I turn eighteen and can leave on my own, let's go and see the ocean together!"

Annie was dumb-fonded. He wanted to see the ocean, she got that. But with _her?_

"Armin-" she opened her mouth to answer when her phone rang.

She flinched visibly and stretched her hand forward to take it from the nightstand. She pressed her lips together when she saw the I.D.

_Dad._

She let the phone down on the cushion and turned to Armin, thinking her father would give up when he saw how motivated she was to ignore him. Unfortunately, he didn't. 

"Aren't you gonna get that?" Armin gestured to her phone.

"No," she said quietly.

"Are you mad with each other or anything?" 

Annie closed her eyes and sighed, trying to compose herself. 

"I just don't want to have anything to do with him right now."

For a brief moment, her phone stopped ringing and the room went silent. Then, it began again.

"He seems quite desperate," Armin pointed out.

Annie buried her face in her hands and sighed drastically.

"Please make it stop," she begged. 

Armin leaned forward and took her phone in his hand, delaying the call before muting it. All in less than one minute. 

It was that easy, and it hadn't crossed Annie's mind _once. In an entire week_.

"Are you sure you don't wanna talk to him?" he handed her the phone.

"Yes," she said in a firm voice, putting the cellphone back on the nightstand beside the bed.

"Look, I know how shitty parents may be, and I won't press you with the matter, b-"

"Which I'm thankful for," Annie deadpanned. 

Armin sighed. But it didn't matter what he wanted. Just as mister Church had said, it was Annie's choice whether to tell him or not.

He hoped he could least keep the conversation going.

"So, do you know anything about Greek Mythology?"

Annie smirked.

"I'm a pro at Greek Mythology."

"Really?" he raised an eyebrow. 

"Yeah. It was my favourite subject in high school."

She suddenly remembered something and took her phone from the nightstand once again.

"Wait, let me just..." she unlocked it and searched for Reiner's number. "I don't want to worry him," she explained, typing something. "Reiner, I mean," she added. 

Armin diverted his gaze, the small, white carpet suddenly seeming very interesting.

"So, um..." he tried to come up with a proper way of asking this.

 _Are you two seeing each other?_ No, it seemed too mean. _Are you going out together?_ Rude. _Is he your boyfriend?_ No, it sounded like he was jealous. _Which he was not._

He sighed, earning a glare from Annie. She shrugged her shoulders before going back to her phone and resuming to typing.

"What's the thing between you and Reiner?" he heard himself say. He mentally facepalmed himself after saying that.

_Geez, Arlert. Did you have to say that? She's gonna hate you now._

Annie looked at him with a crooked eyebrow, a grin on her face. 

"We're friends. That's all." 

Armin's cheeks were on fire. He rushed to conclusions again.

"Why?" Annie asked in a teasing voice.

He turned his head away, hoping she didn't notice the spreading blush in his cheeks.

"I thought...I thought you were...you know."

"Dating?" she helped him out, rolling her eyes.

He nodded slightly, rubbing the back of his neck. He was embarrassed for asking that.

"A lot of people assume that," she said while putting her phone back. "What's so wrong about two people of different genders being platonic friends?"

Armin felt his cheeks heating up even more.

"It's not wrong, just...-" he rubbed the back of his neck, "-you seemed quite close to him," he mumbled. 

"Yeah? Because we've known each other since childhood?" she said, narrowing her eyes. 

"I'm sorry, okay? I didn't mean to make you mad, I was just curious," he said a little too loud.

Annie shrugged and diverted her gaze.

"What were you saying about Greek Mythology?" she tried to change the topic.

Armin sighed slightly and rolled his eyes. She was always changing the subject when she didn't like where it was going. 

"Let's debate whether Hades was treated right or not," he said after searching his mind. That question and the desire to talk about Hades' fate have been bugging him for ages.

Annie cocked an eyebrow, a smirk playing on her lips.

"That's gonna be interesting."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The last part just randomly popped in my mind.
> 
> Also, _holy cat_ is an actual curse in my mother tongue. I know it doesn't make any sense in English, but at least it sounds funny ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯


	10. Confessions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> {\\__/}  
> ( • . •)  
> / >Here, have some blushy Annie.

All she wanted to do that morning was to paint her nails with her blue nail polish. An easy task, right? It only takes two minutes to paint your nails and one more for the polish to dry. Easy-pizy, a piece of cake. Right?

Wrong.

When your fingers just won't listen to you, painting your nails can be one of the most difficult tasks.

And that was Annie's case.

She had tried and failed to paint her nails three times that morning. The skin around her nails was soaked in blue nail polish, her fingers trembling worse than ever. She felt exhausted. Done and tired. Her fingers were shaking and her vision was playing her.

She took a piece of cotton in her shaky hand and attempted to erase the excess of blueness around her nails. She was doing just fine, the thumb turned out perfectly. But then her hand took a wrong turn and she managed to erase half of the polish from the actual nail.

She cursed and threw the peace of cotton away. She buried her face in her hands, taking in a deep breath, only to slowly exhale it after five seconds of holding the air in.

"Annie?" Armin cracked the door open and sneaked his head inside her bay.

He closed the door behind him and slowly crossed the path between it and her bed. He smiled at the sight of Annie, sitting in bed, still in her nightclothes, her hair down and messy.

"You have blue paint on your forehead," he pointed out, sitting down on the chair in front of the bed and leaning his crutches against the nightstand. 

"No shit, Sherlock," she barked, trying to wipe it away with the back of her hand.

That's when he saw her nails. Or, whatever, fingers. She had metallic-blue polish all around her nails. He chuckled at her failed attempt to paint them. He found it cute, actually.

Annie blushed and turned her head away, trying to mimic irritation.

Armin ripped a piece of cotton and soaked it in acetone.

"Here, let me help you out," he said.

He firsthand cleaned the paint on her forehead. Then, he took her hand in his and began to work on her fingers, under the patient eyes of a pouting Annie.

Her fingers were so bonny and small and they seemed so fragile, Armin thought he might break them.

"There you go," he announced once he was done fixing her nails.

Annie took a look at her hands. The nail polish around her fingers was gone now. Her nails looked...good. Pretty, even. She smiled slightly at the thought. 

"Thanks, Armin," she said in a low voice. "They look nice," she lifted her head to look at his face.

Her eyes stunned Armin once again. They were giving off warmth and gratitude, their icy touch brighter than ever as if painting her nails and seeing the final result would have made her extremely happy. They looked just like a painting in which an artist had poured their entire soul. He could get lost in those eyes.

He gently smiled at her before tugging a bang of hair behind her ear. His fingers lingered on her soft hair for a while before he realized how weird it might have been for Annie, who has turned as red as a tomato. He quickly removed his hand.

"They took your bandages off," she said.

He looked down at his arm and sighed. It looked terrible, big and ugly scars and cuts all around it.

"Yeah."

"They're gonna heal, Armin. They will fade with time." 

A million thoughts crossed his mind. Sure, he appreciated the support, but how could she know that? _Unless..._

No. Armin refused to think about it. There was no way Annie would have done anything like that.

Annie put her hand on his shoulder and looked into his baby-blue eyes, smiling.

"You'll see."

Armin snorted at her statement. He felt tears forming in his eyes.

"Geez, Annie. You're gonna make me cry again." 

He wiped the edges of his eyes with the back of his sleeve.

"It's my guilty pleasure," Annie teased.

She gave him a small smile and threw her arms around him. Armin chuckled and embraced her, feeling her warmth.

"What's this for?" he questioned.

"It's a happy hug."

"A happy hug?" Armin raised an eyebrow. 

Annie tightened her hold on him.

"Yes. All of our hugs were sad hugs. They happened because one of us was down." She buried her head in his shoulder, taking in his ocean-breeze scent, the tips of his hair tickling her forehead. "And this is a happy hug."

"So I take you're happy now," he said, stroking her hair. 

Annie nodded slightly, closing her eyes. 

"I'm glad, then," he moved from his chair to sit beside her on the bed.

He inhaled the cherry-flowers fragrance she was giving off and smiled to himself. He hadn't felt this good and lively in a long time. It was like Annie just broke into his life with no permission and took all the pain away, asking for nothing in return.

"Have I thanked you yet?" he whispered in her ear.

Annie turned her head to face him and locked eyes with him. 

"What for?"

Armin pressed his forehead against hers and smiled.

"For making me want to live again. Thank you," he said.

Annie rolled her eyes. 

"You helped yourself, Armin. The only thing I did was to remind you what an amazing person you really are."

"You had no way of knowing that," he mumbled, diverting his gaze.

Annie cupped his face into her palms and forced him to look at her.

"Okay, listen. You are not nothing, you are not a _burden_. You're an _amazing_ person and one of the coolest dudes I've ever met. You're such an interesting guy and the time I've spent with you was great and you know _so_ many things and you're telling stories in such an...an _attractive_ way it's impossible not to get hooked. You matter and I love you and you should stop thinking so low of yourself, goddamnit!" she blurted out.

Armin looked at her with wide eyes, feeling his cheeks burn. It was the very first time someone has ever lectured him for bringing himself down. The first time someone mentioned so many qualities while talking about him, the first time someone has spoken so truthfully about him in a long time. The first time someone has made his heart beat faster, skipping beats and threatening to jump out of his chest.

Annie looked at him, expecting an answer. But Armin kept blushing harder and harder, his eyes as big as onions, as if he just heard something incredibly embarrassing.

Wait.

Did she

Did she just say that all aloud?

_Shit._

Now it was Annie's turn to blush. She squeezed her eyes shut, lowering her head and mentally facepalmed.

_Shit, you just said it all aloud, you embarrassed yourself, you made a fool of yourself, now he's gonna make fun of you and hate you. Bravo!_

Her hands dropped to her sides. She tried to excuse herself.

"Armin, listen, I-"

"I love you too."

_He does **what** now?_

"Wh-What?!"

Annie's eyes shot open and she looked at Armin's red face in disbelief. 

"I said that I-I-I...I-" his tongue tangled in his mouth, anxiety taking over him, "-I love you too," he managed to blurt out.

Annie's mouth was agape. That was certainly something she didn't see coming.

"Y-you mean...like a friend, right? That's what I was talking about," she turned her head to the side, knowing full well that her eyes would give her away.

"No," Armin said in a definitive voice. "I love you as in _' I have romantic feelings for you'_. And it's fine if you don't feel the same, Annie."

She bit her bottom lip.

"It's not like that, Armin..."

He took both her hands in his and smiled genuinely. 

"Then what is it like?"

"Can we-" Annie took in a shaky breath, "-can we pretend none of this happened and talk about anything else? Please?"

She was not ready to deal with that. She was not ready to let her guard down and open a door in the walls she's spent so much time building. 

Armin looked at her face, trying to meet her eyes. She looked somehow saddened, scared even. And it confused him. 

It confused him how, just moments ago, she seemed so confident and full of herself, and now she was a frustrated blushy mess. Like hearing someone tell her they loved her was the strangest thing ever. 

"What else would you like to talk about?" he asked, just like a waiter asking for your order.

Annie bit her lower lip, looking through the window as to distract herself from the obvious thing they needed to talk about. Then she remembered something and turned her head to face him. 

"Ducks," she said.

Armin looked at her with a crooked eyebrow before embarrassment took the place of confusion. _How could he have forgotten that?_

_"Yes. Because they're small and cute and yellow and- oh my God, Annie!"_

__

_"What?" the look of utter panic on her face had made him feel somehow weird._

__

__

__

_"You're a duck!" he had exclaimed playfully._

__

__

The memory made him turn red. He found it funny at the time, but after Annie had stormed out of his bay he started feeling somehow guilty. Like he had upset her.

__

"Annie, back then... I mean, it wasn't my intention to offend you and I'm sorry," he said rubbing his nape.

__

"It's fine, really," she answered. "Sorry for reacting like that. I wasn't mad at you or anything, just...confused, I guess."

__

"But you have avoided me for a whole week after that and I thought you hated me," he said in a childish voice, pouting like a little kid.

__

Annie giggled seeing him like that.

__

"I could never hate you, Armin."

__

She raised a hesitant hand, aiming for his cheek. She drew back a little, only to reconsider later. She felt so proud when she eventually managed to get her palm on his smooth skin like she's gotten a great achievement.

__

Armin's smile spread across his face, his cheekbones more prominent now, his eyes flooded with happiness.

__

He put his arms around Annie, dragging her closer to him and burying his face in the crook of her neck. He heard her chuckle slightly before wrapping her arms around him.

__

"I love you," he whispered in her ear.

__


	11. Comfort

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Here goes their first kiss.

They had spent the rest of the day together in Annie's room, cuddled in each other. They talked about anything that crossed their minds, from whether to their place in the universe.

They even played _21 questions_ , which basically implied asking the other person 21 questions.

At the end of the day, Armin had found out that Annie loved sweets, especially donuts. She loved cats and their purr, she preferred lilies to roses, broccoli was her favourite vegetable and eggs were making her sick.

When she was little she had aspired to be an athlete, she even practiced judo and excelled in badminton, often winning the highest scores in competitions. She also used to play the violin, but stopped once she got diagnosticated since she couldn't coordinate her fingers anymore.

She hated to feel her hair on her nape so she was always keeping it in a bun and dreaded human interaction because people had the annoying habit of poking their noses into her business.

She had ended up in the cancer section because she was the only patient that suffered from an ataxia so they decided to put her there since there's no certain cure for either one. She had had three failed surgeries and was currently being treated by doctor Hange Zöe, her fifth doctor, and the only one who seemed to know what they were doing.

Oh, and she was lactose intolerant.

She also hated to talk about her past. She avoided every question that contained the words _childhood, parents_ , or _upbringing_.

Armin decided not to push her and just got past it, gently caressing her cheek or kissing her forehead when she seemed uncomfortable, but deep down he knew something was off. She avoided the matter as if talking about it would open old wounds and Armin could totally understand. He didn't like to talk about certain things either.

But she seemed so shut in herself and sad and angry at the same time he couldn't help but worry. He knew for a fact that she had been hurt badly, so badly it left deep scars. And he was willing to make that scars fade.

As for Armin, he told her about his undying dream to travel the world. He wanted to see everything, every little corner of it. From the Eiffel Tower in Paris to the old remainings of the Roman Castre in that little town from Romania which's name he couldn't remember. From the temples dedicated to the ancient gods in Greece to the British Library in London. From the Mediterranean Ocean to the Sahara Desert. Mount Fuji in Japan. Angel Falls in Venezuela. The museums, the libraries, the cultural houses, the historical monuments. _Everything_.

The way he was talking about all these was fascinating and it got Annie hooked immediately. They quickly forgot about the game. She was looking at him with wide eyes, a slight blush in her cheeks, as he was telling her about his future plans.

"And then, eventually, I'd get bored and come back home," Armin concluded.

"That's all?" Annie asked hopefully.

"Annie, I've been literally talking for five hours straight."

"Well, yeah, but..."

She blushed and diverted her eyes to check the time. It was almost lunchtime.

"You sure you don't have anything else in that mind of yours? Something I could listen to?" she looked up to meet his gaze, trying the puppy's eyes.

Armin burst out laughing and hugged her tightly, his hurt hand on her cheek. She was the first person who has ever asked him to keep talking and it made him feel great. But he also wanted to hear her out.

"You're sweet, but I also want to listen to your stories."

"Hnh," Annie buried her face in his chest, hoping he won't see her slight blush. _He just called me cute_ , she thought, trying not to freak out.

"My dad seems to have given up on trying to reach out," she mumbled.

Armin lowered his head and placed his chin on top of her head.

"Maybe you are the one who should reach out," he thought out loud.

"No," Annie deadpanned in a definitive voice.

"Annie..."

She straightened up and pulled away from his arms, trying her best to compose herself.

" _No_. I've done this shit before and I ended up in a coma. There's no way on earth I'm _ever_ getting in touch with him ever again. Period." she snapped, anger in her eyes.

Armin was startled. He had figured out that she had some family issues and some kind of father wound, as well as low self-esteem. He knew she was overthinking every little thing and that her kindness did not come from nowhere. She did act like a traumatized kid.

But... _this_? What did he do, beat her up till she collapsed? What could she have possibly done to deserve that kind of treatment?

He stretched his hand forward to cup one of her cheeks. She leaned in his touch and closed her eyes.

"I'm sorry, Annie," Armin whispered. "I really am. I shouldn't have insisted on this."

She nodded slightly, her eyes still closed, her cheek still in his palm. He caressed it gently.

"And it's okay if you don't want to talk about it." He carried on. "I get it now, really."

Annie nodded again, not opening her eyes. The way she refused to say anything was frustrating Armin, making him wonder if he should keep this up or just drop it and act like it didn't happen.

He pondered it a little. On one hand, it could have helped her vent and maybe give Armin some answers. It could reveal to him who she really was and where she came from.

Then, again, the therapist's words crossed his mind: _It's her choice whether to tell you or not_. It's her story, her past. It's her decision if she wants to share it or keep it to herself.

And it was fine either way. Armin knew what he had to: she was a strong person. She had been in hell and walked through it with bravery and determination. She was strong enough to face her own problems and deal with them, no matter how terrifying it seemed.

Armin sighed heavily. He decided to drop the matter and let her be. He loved her anyway, he didn't need to know every little detail from her past. He loved her for what she was in that given moment. And he wanted her to know it.

He pulled her into his arms and embraced her, holding her tightly. But she did not hug him back.

"My father," Annie said in a muffled voice, taking in a deep breath, "he adopted me when I was two. He raised me as his own. He's always been a strict parent, he wanted me to be perfect, but he wasn't abusive. Or, whatever. Until I got diagnosticated and he turned to alcohol."

He tugged her even closer, feeling his torso ache, but he couldn't care less. He wanted to give her all the support and love she needed right at that moment.

"I don't want you to feel pity for me," she said as she raised her head just enough to meet his eyes. "I don't need it."

"I know," Armin said in a low voice, leaning his forehead against hers. "But I'm here for you. And not out of pity but love and gratitude. I can either talk you through this, maybe it helps you vent and release the pain, or distract you from it. And it's totally up to you."

Annie gave him a small side smile, a tear rolling down her cheek. Armin wiped it with his thumb before kissing her eye, feeling her soft skin against his chapped lips.

"You missed," Annie murmured, a playful tone in her voice.

Armin smiled widely before gently brushing his lips against her smooth ones. He tugged one hand in her hair, the other still on her back, as she wrapped hers around his neck.

She kissed him back, taking one last look at his face: his flushed cheeks, his blonde bangs ending just above his eyebrows. His slided blue eyes, sparkling pure happiness for the first time since they met.

Annie smiled against his lips and closed her eyes. She felt on cloud nine. The world could have ended at that moment and she wouldn't care less. She was happy. Extremely happy. Like all her worries had vanished. And this, thanks to a small anxious, and insecure blond boy.


	12. Get together

"Are you sure that's gonna be fine?" Eren asked, walking down the hall.

Armin had asked his friends to come to the hospital that afternoon, to meet Annie and the others. He wanted them to meet all those wonderful people: Connie and Sasha, who brought his smile back, the cute and caring Krista and her girlfriend Ymir. Mina and Marco, that treated him kindly as soon as he shook hands with them. Even Reiner had managed to come to the hospital that Friday.

And Annie. Annie was the most important one. She had helped him the most, supporting him when he was down and showering him in love.

She's been super-protective ever since they confessed to each other. She'd visit him three times a day, making sure he was doing fine, join him in the cafeteria for every meal, and, overall, just spent every minute she could by his side. She even participated in one of his online classes, cuddled up in the loveseat, and following the discussion taking place. After the class had ended, Armin turned to her and asked why she decided to attend his human-rights class that day. Annie looked down and shrugged, saying she just wanted to know how a university course was like. And Armin found it quite sad.

"It's gonna be fine," Armin reassured his friends.

He offered them one of his best smiles.

"How did you meet them, anyway?" Mikasa asked.

 _Oh, I just happened to wake up from a coma and be welcomed back to the living world by a stranger so I decided to make friends with her and her other friends_ , he thought.

He tried his best to fight a snicker. Who would have thought that he'd end up like this, surrounded by all those beautiful people?

"In the cafeteria," Armin told his friend. "I was struggling to carry my food and this girl offered to help me so I sat with her and her friends," he half lied.

"And you became best buddies," Mikasa said suspiciously.

"Kinda."

Mikasa exchanged a look with Eren, who just shrugged his shoulders.

"What aren't you telling us, Armin?"

Mikasa knew something was off. She could _feel_ it. First, Armin would have called and told them about the whole thing a lot earlier. He wasn't the type to make friends with a bunch of teenagers he barely knew, especially not in a hospital. And then, his story didn't make any sense to her. How could his mother have possibly sent him to the drug store in the middle of the night when he didn't even have a driving license. _What was Armin doing in a godforsaken car without a driving license?_

He looked at her with a cocked eyebrow, leaning in his crutches.

"I've already told you everything. Four times."

Mikasa opened her mouth to protest but was cut off by her blond friend who announced them they were there.

He led them to a table in the back of the mass hall. A group of teenagers chatting casually to each other was there and they didn't seem to be older than Armin. A bald boy trying to shove a spoon of broccoli in his ginger friend's mouth, a blonde sweet girl talking to her freckled tanned friend, a blonde young man with a small bread.

_Five spare seats._

"You're here already?" a strangely familiar voice said from behind.

Mikasa turned around and saw two other girls. One of them had a sleepy look on her face, her raven hair tied back in a low ponytail. She had a casted leg and needed support to walk.

The other one was wearing a large white hoodie, hands in pockets, her lemon hair tied in a messy bun. Her frozen blue eyes and roman nose looked painfully familiar for Mikasa.

"Annie!" Armin exclaimed joyfully.

He went to hug the petite girl, who gave him a small smile before embracing him. The blonde man sat from his chair and went to greet them as well.

"Annie?! Annie as in Annie Leonhart?!" Eren blurted out.

"No way," Mikasa gasped, her eyes widened.

Annie raised a curious brow and studied the two of them for a while before realizing who they were. Holy cat, _no._

"What are you doing here?" Eren asked, pointing a finger at her.

"I'm sick, isn't it obvious?" she deadpanned.

"Don't talk to him like that," Mikasa warned.

"Or what?"

Armin shared a concerned look with Pieck. They were both dumb-fonded. How did they know each other? And, most importantly, why were they acting so cold?

Annie and Mikasa stared at each other dead in the eye for what seemed like forever. Then the strangest thing happened: they both cracked a smile and shared a hug.

Armin's mouth dropped. He had no idea what was going on and was growing more confused every second.

"I thought I was never gonna see you again after you dodged me for three years. I almost gave up on hope," Mikasa confessed, hugging the blonde close. "Jesus, Annie. We've been so worried about you."

"Sorry 'bout that," Annie said, choking a bit.

Mikasa quickly drew back, her hands on Annie's shoulders, and inspected her. She seemed so changed. Her cheekbones were more prominent, her muscles were gone, she even looked like she had lost a lot of weight. Her complexion seemed paler than the last time they've seen each other face to face. Her eyes looked lifeless and frozen, nothing from their past spark in them. The black bags under her eyes made Mikasa frown.

"Um...can I know what's going on?" Armin spoke up.

Mikasa removed her hands from the blonde's shoulders and turned to her friend.

"Don't tell me you don't remember her," she said.

Now Armin was even more confused. Was he supposed to remember more than the past month?

"Annie. From my judo class," Mikasa explained.

Armin tilted his head, making a face at his friend.

"Yeah, she's my g-" Annie shoved her elbow in his stomach, making him gasp, "-I-I mean, friend. We met last month."

"No? We've known her since third grade, Arm," Eren added. "She was in Mika's judo class. She kicked my ass once."

That lit a light in his head. He remembered how the two of them had accompanied Mikasa during a competition when they were little. She had won the second place, the first one  
having been earned by one of her blonde classmates. After the competition had ended, the girl tried to congratulate Mikasa, but their loud-mouthed friend saw it as a threat and attacked her. Long story short, the blonde judo-flipped him and he had to wear a cast for six weeks.

"Wait, so- _what_?"

Armin's mouth dropped. _No way_ they were the same person. That girl was always smiling and her bright-blue eyes were sparking joy. They had hanged out a few times, he remembered Mikasa talking about her quite a lot, but he never caught her name. All he knew was that it started with an _'A'_. And after collapsing during a competition three years ago, she completely vanished from their lives. He couldn't even remember how she looked like. Besides, she was nothing like the stoic and apathetic Annie he knew.

The slight blush on her face and the quite embarrassed look in her eyes told him that, yes, it was true. Armin took hold of her hand and squeezed it lightly, giving her a reassuring smile. Her face turned even redder.

"Am I missing something?" Reiner asked and that's when it occurred to Armin that the others were still there and were currently watching the two of them.

Mikasa looked at them astonished, her mouth agape.

"Since when?"

"Since when what?" Annie said in an annoyed voice, shoving Armin's hand away.

The raven-haired girl raised an eyebrow, a smirk playing on her lips. She shared a look with Eren, who was also grinning like an idiot. They were _holding hands_.

"No...It's okay," she patted Annie's shoulder, earning a frown from the blonde. "I get it."

"What do you get?"

"My little girl has grown," Reiner sang, shuffling her hair.

They decided to drop the topic after Annie threatened to slam both their faces against a wall. They instead sat down and Armin introduced his friends to his hospital buddies.

"You're studying at Rose University too?" Pieck said, enthusiastically.

"They're rookies," Reiner said with a smirk.

"Which department?"

"The law one," Eren answered.

"And I'm in the psychiatry one," Mikasa added.

"That's so cool," Pieck stated. "I'm in my last year there, in the philosophy department."

"Really? And you?" Eren turned to Reiner.

"I graduated last summer."

Armin could see enthusiasm raising on his friend's face. A wholesome of questions rained on the young man. How was the final exam, how much time did he spend studying for it, what grade did he get, what degree did he have, what was he doing now? Reiner took his time to answer every question, telling them everything they wanted to know. Ymir got bored after less than ten minutes and went to her bay, saying how she hated school discussions. Krista excused herself shortly after, coming up with some lame lie.  
Connie listened patiently, noting how university life was like. He even made some funny comments about how he was going to finish high school and take his whole life off, being sick of learning useless stuff. Sasha joined him in his rebellion and agreed to open a cafè with him as soon as she got out of hospital. After finishing her statement, Connie shoved a spoon of soup in her mouth.

They laughed together and told stories, like the one where Marlo randomly showed up in class one day and stated that he knew how thick the principal's eyebrows were. Pieck and Rener burst into laughter.

"They were even bigger when I was learning there," Reiner said between laughs.

Pieck told them about her philosophy teacher, who made them stay at school two extra hours to complain about his dead cat. They all agreed that Dok was a freak who liked to terrorize kids. They shared random experiences that crossed their minds, laughing, and having a great time together.

Annie was the only one who didn't say anything, rarely offering Armin a shadow of a smile when he'd ask her something. He tried to include her in the conversation, asking for her opinion on something or prompting her to talk, but she only shrugged, not saying more than two sentences at once.

The others just carried on with their conversation, apparently ignoring the petit quiet girl at the table. But Armin couldn't help but worry about her silence.


	13. Nightmare

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like I should apologize for taking so long. Sorry. BUT GUESS WHO GOT THE HIGHEST SCORES THOSE PAST TWO WEEKS?
> 
> Anyway. Here's the chapter. Hope you enjoy it.

Laying in bed in one of her black T-shirts and leggings, Annie tried to finally get some sleep as the liquid in her perfusion went down. She had stayed up all night, her worst nightmares showing up as soon as she closed her eyes. All of them led her back to her main worry: her father.

The red stains on the floor. His reddened eyes, his merciless hands. The texture of the metallic bed-frame. Some warm liquid in her mouth. The door being slammed open, someone yelling her name. That tricky light, people shouting inaudible things. The noise. 

Reiner's sorrowful face when she woke up and be had to tell her everything. The sensation of the world falling beneath her feet. The tears that wouldn't go down. The emptiness. The realisation that she had lost everything. 

All the things that happened after he left: Marcel's failed surgery, Bert's death, Reiner having to go through the trouble of becoming her legal guardian so she wouldn't have to go through those things again. And it was all her fault. All of it. Maybe if she had fougth back it wouldn't have happened. Maybe if she had cut her ties with him a lot earlier both of her late friends would have been still alive. _Maybe if she weren't sick _...__

____

____

All she knew about her father was that he was out of rehab. She had no idea if he returned to town or if he got his house back. She didn't know if he was officially clean and sober or if he just somehow tricked the doctors. She didn't know if he knew where she was or even remembered that his daughter was ill and under treatment. He might have even forgotten about what happened the last time they saw each other face to face, since he was long wasted at the time. 

____

And there she was, almost a year later, laying in bed and worrying over something she couldn't control.

____

Two knocks on the door made her flinch. _Armin _, she thought. He was always knocking like that. She sighed heavily and tugged the blanket over her shoulders before calling for him to come in.__

______ _ _

"Yo!" he greeted as soon as he got into her bay.

______ _ _

"Morning," she answered in a monotone voice.

______ _ _

"Annie, we had dinner half an hour ago," Armin giggled, sitting on the chair in front of her bed. Annie shrugged, a tired expression on her face.

______ _ _

Armin frowned at the sight of the perfusion going into her tiny bony arm. 

______ _ _

"What's that for?"

______ _ _

"I don't know either," Annie said in a low voice.

______ _ _

He bit his lower lip. Seeing her like that, laying in bed on one side while some watery thing made its way into her body and looking completely hopeless made his heart ache. It seemed _unfair _. It seemed unfair that someone like Annie was even _existing _in a place like that. He opened his mouth to say something, but before any words could come out, Annie cut him off.____

__

________ _ _ _ _

__

"Did your friends leave already?"

__

________ _ _ _ _

__

He nodded slightly, pressing his lips together. Annie hummed in response and prompted her other hand on the mattress, trying to sit up, only to fall back on one side. She let an unpleasant sound out before trying again.

__

________ _ _ _ _

__

Armin came to sit next to her, putting his arms around her shoulders and making her lay back down. 

__

________ _ _ _ _

__

"It'd be better for you not to force yourself," he said, forcing a small smile.

__

________ _ _ _ _

__

"If you say so, doctor," she murmured.

__

________ _ _ _ _

__

Armin sneaked his hand under the blanket and started massaging her back, watching her expression soften.

__

________ _ _ _ _

__

"Why haven't you told me that you knew me?"

__

________ _ _ _ _

__

Annie closed her eyes and shrugged. 

__

________ _ _ _ _

__

"You wouldn't have remembered."

__

________ _ _ _ _

__

"Maybe I would have."

__

________ _ _ _ _

__

Her eyebrows furrowed. 

__

________ _ _ _ _

__

"There's not much to, anyway." She opened her eyes and lifted the edge of her lip upwards. "You used to avoid me every time we hung out."

__

________ _ _ _ _

__

Armin pressed his lips together. Was he that rude to her back than? He couldn't recall it, but he was sure he wouldn't have done it on purpose. 

__

________ _ _ _ _

__

"I'm sorry," he said, stopping his hand's motions and resting it on her shoulder blade.

__

________ _ _ _ _

__

Annie shrugged again, diverting her gaze. From her point of view, it was better like that. They got the chance to start over and put the past behind them, not letting it interfere with their current friendship. And it spared Annie of a lot of explanations to give, or so she assumed.

__

________ _ _ _ _

__

"I remember you blacked out during a competition. They took you to the hospital and we never heard of you afterward," he said.

__

________ _ _ _ _

__

She clenched her teeth. She didn't want to think back to it. She didn't want to remember the feeling of disappointing instructor Magath and her father. Fortunately, Armin got the message of her silence.

__

________ _ _ _ _

__

"Is that why you sneaked in my bay and waited for me to wake up? Because you knew who I was?"

__

________ _ _ _ _

__

Annie's expression changed again, looking somehow pained. He moved his hand from her back to her head and began to gently stroke her forehead. She stayed quiet for a while before finally peeping up at him.

__

________ _ _ _ _

__

"Not entirely," she admitted. 

__

________ _ _ _ _

__

Armin raised an eyebrow, waiting for her to continue.

__

________ _ _ _ _

__

"You know," she said in a shaky voice, "one of my friends- actually, forget it. I'm not telling you."

__

________ _ _ _ _

__

She closed her eyes again and buried her face in the pillow. She couldn't just _talk _about him after everything that happened. She wasn't even sure she had the right to say his name.__

_____ _

________ _ _ _ _

_____ _

He bent down and smooched the side of her head, making her flinch slightly. 

_____ _

________ _ _ _ _

_____ _

"I love you," he said in a low voice, sparkles in his eyes.

_____ _

________ _ _ _ _

_____ _

She lidded her eyelids and looked at him with her blue orbs. He could see all the pain she had tried to bottle up, all the guilt she felt in those fabulous icy-blue eyes and it didn't seem right. It didn't seem right for someone as kind and lovely as Annie to suffer like that.

_____ _

________ _ _ _ _

_____ _

He cupped her face in his hands and gently brushed his lips against hers. Just as she was about to return the kiss, he stopped and drew back.

_____ _

________ _ _ _ _

_____ _

"Did you-" he bit his bottom lip, fearing that it might sound _wrong _"- did you take a hot shower?" he said, narrowing his eyes.__

_______ _ _ _

________ _ _ _ _

_______ _ _ _

"Why do you even _care _?" Annie asked with a crooked eyebrow.__

_________ _ _ _ _ _

________ _ _ _ _

_________ _ _ _ _ _

"Your skin is warm," he said in a serious voice.

_________ _ _ _ _ _

________ _ _ _ _

_________ _ _ _ _ _

Now she was more confused than before. 

_________ _ _ _ _ _

________ _ _ _ _

_________ _ _ _ _ _

"And?"

_________ _ _ _ _ _

________ _ _ _ _

_________ _ _ _ _ _

"Please, just answer the question," he demanded, sounding somehow worried.

_________ _ _ _ _ _

________ _ _ _ _

_________ _ _ _ _ _

"Yes, I did." He sighed in relief, earning a glare from Annie. "Now tell me what this is about," she said, growing pissed off with his act.

_________ _ _ _ _ _

________ _ _ _ _

_________ _ _ _ _ _

With flushed cheeks, he told her that he thought she had a fever. Annie smirked and pinched his nose, teasing him for worrying so much. He couldn't argue with that. He tended to overthink every little thing. _"It's the anxiety!" _he tried to justify himself, which only made Annie laugh more. He tried to mock annoyance, but he couldn't stay mad long. He loved seeing her laugh.__

___________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________ _ _ _ _

___________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

"You know," he said after she had stopped laughing, " I read somewhere that taking long hot showers is a sign of lack of affection."

___________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________ _ _ _ _

___________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

Annie looked at him with bright eyes before pouting like a five-year-old.

___________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________ _ _ _ _

___________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

"Well you've been neglecting me those past two days," she said in a childish voice.

___________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________ _ _ _ _

___________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

He smiled at her again and bent down to kiss her forehead.

___________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________ _ _ _ _

___________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

"Sorry," he whispered before brushing his lips against hers. 

___________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________ _ _ _ _

___________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

She let out a surprised noise before placing her hand on his shoulder, deepening the kiss. She loved him. She loved the way he made her feel, she loved the butterflies in her stomach every time she was with him. She loved just goofing around with him without being judged, she loved that she could rely on him, she loved _loving him _. And she was so grateful that they met again, even under those not-so-nice circumstances.__

_____________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________ _ _ _ _

_____________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_____________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________ _ _ _ _

_____________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

***

_____________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________ _ _ _ _

_____________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_____________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________ _ _ _ _

_____________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

"Miss Leonhart?"

_____________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________ _ _ _ _

_____________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

Doctor Hange walked into her bay shortly after Armin had left. They walked towards the blonde's spot and began flipping through her registers, scraping the back of their head.

_____________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________ _ _ _ _

_____________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

"I have your examination results."

_____________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________ _ _ _ _

_____________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

Annie's eyes widened for a second before she frowned. Judging from the doctor's expression, it couldn't be anything good.

_____________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________ _ _ _ _

_____________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _


	14. Colors

Colors. 

Three white, two red, two blue. 

Seven pills. But she's always thought about them as colors, not pills. Saying you have pills to take sounds depressing, while referring to them as _colors_ is more interesting. 

She got that from Berthold. When he first got into the hospital he'd refuse to take anything they gave him. So she one day took him by the hand and showed him that she also had medicine to take. She explained how essential it was to stick to the program and respect it strictly in order to get better. But he got fascinated with the variety of colors her pills had and stopped paying attention midway through her monologue. He instead pointed at them and said something about tasting the rainbow. 

So she's been referring to them as colors since that day. It was like some kind of inside joke with a dead guy.

Annie sighed while getting them out of the plastic file. She didn't like that. Depending on pills, that's it. She poured herself a glass of water and swallowed them all in one go. 

_Done for today_ , she thought as she laid on the mattress.

***

"Come on, Sash, you're so- no, no, no, make le- ugh!" 

Connie and Sasha had been already playing for two hours when Ymir got there. They didn't have the chance to play so often, since neither of them owned a computer. So they'd invade Pieck's room every time she got there and play on hers. 

"Let me get this straight," said Ymir, plopping on the cushion across from the raven-haired girl's bed, "the jerk broke up with you because of your _disease_." 

"Well, it's not easy to live with someone with Brittle bones," she said sadly. 

"But he knew you were sick when you got together." 

Pieck sighed again. Of course he knew, they met in the hospital after all. Which made things even harder for Porco, since he had to get back in the place his brother died in every time she broke something. 

Ymir leaned against the backside of the couch and crossed her hands, shaking her head. 

"I'm gonna break that sucker's nose," she said. 

A small chuckle escaped Pieck's lips as Connie let out an exasperated cry. Sasha got killed again. 

The door burst open, Krista posing in its frame, a huge grin on her face. 

"Guess who just got kicked out!" she exclaimed, taking a few steps inside and closing the door. 

Ymir's mouth dropped and Sasha got up to strangle her into a hug while Connie clapped exuberantly. 

"You're leaving already?" the freckled girl asked. 

"Yep," she said, her grin spreading from ear to ear. 

"That's great! Congrats!" Pieck said, doing her best to sound cheerful. 

Krista tried to get out of Sasha's choking hug, which only made the brunette squeeze her harder. She eventually gave up and let her friend show her enthusiasm. She was the first one to get out after Reiner and she hoped she wouldn't ever have to come back as a patient. 

"Do you know who's gonna be on cloud nine hearing the good news?" Pieck asked, a genuine smile on her face. 

Krista's eyes widened for the slightest second. _Annie_. Of course. The blonde girl who showed her around and introduced her to the others. The girl who made her take her medicine, the girl thanks to whom she was now healthy and able to leave this damned place. She had to thank her one last time before taking off. 

"Let's go tell her," Ymir said, getting up off the couch. 

Pieck gave the four of them a small wave as they were leaving her bay. They suggested for her to come along, but she wasn't in the mood of getting out of bed. Besides, she had a casted leg. 

The group got out and walked down the hall, chatting about how hard it would be for them to adapt to not seeing Krista every day. As much as she was excited to get out and live a pretty normal life, she wasn't too keen on leaving her friends either. 

They took the corner to Annie's corridor and their conversation got cut off by the noise. Nurses were running in and out of one particular room, each one of them coming back with a different thing in their hands: towels, injections, even a bowl of some odd-looking liquid. Doctor Hange got there soon after, sprinting towards the room under the shocked faces of the four teenagers. They stopped a little to look at the other patients with a guilty and somewhat disappointed expression before getting in and closing the door, not letting them see the inside. 

But it didn't do any good: they knew exactly whose bay that was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "I'm not even sorry," I say while wiping my eyes with the back of my sleeve.


	15. I'm sorry

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, and welcome back to another episode of _How Many Commas Can I Use in One Sentence._
> 
> Also, you may need some tissues.

The door swung open, revealing the darkness of his small apartment. Reiner dragged his feet inside and locked the door, not bothered to turn the lights on. He got his shoes off, dropped his backpack next to the wall, put his coat in the closet, and grabbed a can of coke before collapsing on the small sofa in the kitchen. 

He was exhausted. His boss's clients were getting more irritating every day and he had to put up with it. It wasn't his fault there wasn't enough evidence to prove their innocence, yet they were blaming him for not trying hard enough. Like there was anything he could do. 

He opened the can and turned the TV on, taking a big sip of his drink. Ah, yes, that one alien movie he had seen thousands of times. Perfect. 

And then his phone rang- and his day got ten times worse when he saw the caller's ID. 

"Reiner Braun?" a very familiar voice asked. 

"That's me." 

"You should come to the hospital."

***

Armin's been knocking on her door for five minutes already and his fist was starting to hurt. Was she asleep? Did she leave without him? Was she mad because he was ten minutes late and decided to ignore him? 

He called her name one last time before cracking the door open and peered inside. Her room was as dark as the night, no sign of anyone being inside. _Maybe she's just sleeping_ , he thought. Armin made his way to her bed and reached his hand for her shoulder when the lights got turned on. 

There was no one in the room, he noticed. 

"If you're looking for Annie," a voice said somewhere from behind him, "she left a couple of minutes ago." 

Armin turned around to be met by a young woman with chin-length wavy light brown hair and large hazel eyes wearing a medical uniform. She had the shade of a grin on her face. 

Armin straightened up and locked eyes with the strange nurse. 

"Where is she?" he asked, feeling his heart sink deeper with every passing second. 

The nurse's lips formed a perfect line. 

"I don't know, I didn't ask," she said, shrugging her shoulders and leaning against the door frame, arms crossed. 

Armin nodded slightly and headed towards the door. He thanked the nurse and left, his eyes catching a weird-looking stain on the floor in the process.

He assumed she went to the cafeteria. She _had_ to be at the cafeteria. 

He walked as fast as he could, going past nurse Petra on his way and getting scolded for not using his crutches. Little did he care about the crutches. He was dead worried. 

He leaned against the wall after entering the cafeteria to catch his breath and let out a sigh of relief when he saw that their usual table was occupied. But as he got closer he noticed that her seat was empty. Where else could she be? 

He pulled his chair, making Sasha flinch while Connie just raised his head from the table and glanced at him. They both looked miserable. 

"What happened?" Armin asked, sounding more panicked than he was planning to. 

"Annie." 

The world collapsed around him when he heard her name. _No way._

"She's in ICU."

***

He got there as fast as he could. He didn't even bother to change his clothes, just jumped in his car and raced to the hospital. He couldn't believe this was happening. He couldn't believe she was going through this again. 

And now he was in the waiting room, face buried in his hands, waiting for the doctors to come out and let him know what was going on. 

He heard steps coming from the opposite direction and raised his head, expecting to see Hitch or some other nurse. His eyes widened in surprise when he saw Armin stop five feet from him, bent down to support his hands on his knees, trying to catch his breath, as if he'd been running. 

"Where-" huff "-where is she?" the smaller blond managed to ask. 

Reiner's eyebrows furrowed and he let his head down, weakly gesturing towards the door in front of him. 

"She… suffered an anaphylactic shock and-and fainted," he said in a low voice. 

"She's gonna be fine, right?" Armin said, more like a statement rather than a question. "She's gonna wake up and walk out of that door on her own two feet. Right?" He didn't even realize how desperate he sounded. He wasn't aware of the tears forming in the corner of his eyes either. All he cared about was Annie and her well-being. 

Reiner stretched his hand forward and patted the boy's shoulder, trying to sound confident. 

"She will." 

Truth be told, he didn't know. She was in critical condition when Hitch called him and he had no idea what was taking them so long in there. He could only hope she'd be fine.

The door swung open and Reiner stood up while Armin jolted in his spot. Doctor Hange got out of the room, looking less miserable than when they entered it and closed the door, avoiding to meet the boys' eyes, their lips forming a perfect line. 

"How is she?" the young man asked, expecting to hear the worst. 

He knew what was coming. He could feel it. She was either going to be comatosed for another three months or already gone. There was no in-between. He could almost hear the doctor say it, just like they did a year ago, after Marcel's surgery. He was going to walk into that room and have one last look at his life-long friend before- 

"She's fine," Hange said. Reiner felt the weight of the world being lifted up from his shoulders. The doctor carried on: "Her condition is- well, not perfect, but it's good. She will wake up soon, but we need to keep her in ICU for a couple of days, to make sure her condition doesn't worsen." 

Armin let the two of them talk and sneaked into the room, anxious to see Annie again, may she be conscious or not. 

She was laying on a bed in the middle of the small room, an oxygen mask on her face and perfusion in her arm. She had her eyes closed, a somehow peaceful expression on her face, looking weaker and more vulnerable than ever. 

He pulled a chair next to her bed and took her weak hand into his. He stroked her smooth skin, rubbing circles on her knuckles. 

"I'm sorry," he mumbled. 

He brought her hand to his trembling lips and placed a soft kiss on top of it, tears rolling down his cheeks. How could he let this happen? He promised he'd be there for her. He _promised_ , he gave her his word. And there she was, unconscious and in intensive care, and he couldn't help but wonder what would have happened if he weren't late. Maybe she'd be fine if he got there earlier. 

"I'm so sorry." 

The door opened with a small crack and Reiner walked inside while Armin wiped his eyes with the back of his sleeve. 

"The doctor said she'll be fine. She will wake up in no time," the taller blond said, putting his hand on top of Armin's shoulder. "Don't worry about her, okay? She's tough, Armin. She can handle herself." 

"I know she can," he said, blowing his nose.


	16. I'm sorry part 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's the guy's birthday today.
> 
> _Let's make him suffer even more._

Hange's been stirring around the office, mumbling inaudible things for a whole hour now and they were driving the others crazy. One by one, they all left the room, finding all sorts of stupid excuses to get out, leaving the scientist alone with the grumpy man. Until, eventually, he decided he had had enough. He let his cup of tea down and cracked his fingers. All at once. 

Hange stopped their movements, hands under their chin, and turned to Levi with a judgy look on their face. 

"That's not healthy at all." 

"Not that what you're doing is, four-eyes," he replied. 

"Why wouldn't it be? I'm just walking around." 

"And stressing yourself out," he noted, taking a sip of tea. 

Hange let out a loud sigh and plopped on the chair nearby. 

"That's _soo_ unfair!" they cried out. "She was doing just fine and then- _puf_! She's unconscious." Hange peaked an eye to Levi, who was giving her an anticipatory look, and carried on: "I mean, I knew what were the risks when I changed her treatment, but still..." 

They dropped their head and took a deep breath in. 

"It's just like Frieda all over again," they mumbled. 

"No, it's not," the short man spoke up. "Leonhart has ambition, she wants to get better. You can't say the same about Reiss." 

"As her doctor, I feel like I could have done a lot better."

Levi rolled his eyes and took another gulp of his tea. 

"You did what you thought was the best at the moment. No one blames you for this. Besides, her breathing was fine when I left. She'll be up in no time." 

Hange leaned back in their chair and chuckled, surprised by Levi's rather talky attitude. The guy did have a heart after all. 

"Yeah. I hope so." 

***

Hitch dropped the blanket on the blonde boy's shoulders and took a step back, admiring the picture. The poor guy was sleeping on a chair next to her patient's bed, still holding her hand in his, head tilted in an impossibly uncomfortable way, while his so precious friend was peacefully sleeping in the hospital bed, cables and all. Reiner had left a couple of hours back, after getting a call from his supervisor. But the smaller blonde boy insisted on staying with her until she woke up, mumbling something about being at fault for her current condition. Like there was any way he could have prevented the medicine from provoking an allergic reaction. 

She remembered blasting into Annie's bay, ready to show off with how incredible her seaside vacation in the middle of autumn had been, only to find the person in question on the floor, coughing her lungs out and shaking uncontrollably. By the time Doctor Hange and the others got there, she had already passed out. 

A weak, sleepy _"miss?"_ from the boy beside her was enough to bring her back to the present. She turned her head in his direction and offered him an appreciative smile. 

"You should go and rest in your bay, I'll take care of her," she suggested. 

Once again, he turned it down. He adjusted his posture on the chair, temporarily letting go of Annie's hand to cover his shoulders with the blanket so he'd be more comfortable. He took hold of the girl's hand again and raised his head to meet Hitch's eyes. Even in the dim light, she could still see the sparks in his blue orbs, the determined look he was giving her. 

"I want to be here when she wakes up," he said. 

Hitch's eyebrows rose in mocking amazement, a smirk playing on her lips. She folded her arms on her chest, tightening the blue coat around her, and leaned back against the wall. 

"So, what's the thing between you two?" 

He didn't really know. Were they just friends? Old pals from middle school that used to ignore each other? Or cuddly friends? Or more than friends? 

Armin blinked rapidly in her direction, his cheeks turning pink, before he turned his head away, his eyes falling on Annie. He squeezed her hand, hoping he'd get a reaction from her, but the only thing he got was silence. He sighed, seeing how hopeless she looked. 

_You should have been there_ , the voice in his head said. _You should have been there for her and support her. You should have been there you should have been there you should have been there you should have-_

"Armin," the nurse put her hand on his shoulder. "She's going to be fine." 

He pressed his lips together and looked at her. 

"You keep saying that, yet she's still not waking up," he said, a desperate tone in his voice. 

"She needs rest," Hitch insisted. 

"She's been resting for five hours now!" Armin didn't even realize how loud his voice was. 

"And what do you want me to do?" she made two steps back, her voice as high as his. "Shake her out of unconsciousness?" 

"Yes!" he yelled. He was desperate, all he wanted was to see Annie's icy orbs again, those oases of serenity he had grown to love. Hitch clenched her fists, her eyebrows furrowed, and for a second considered slapping the boy. Then she decided against it, seeing the tears forming in the corners of his eyes. "Yes, you should be able to do that," he added in a much lower voice. 

She made her way to the door and opened it brutally, then turned to Armin to shoot him an angered look. "Well, you can do it yourself if you think you'd do a better job!" She stormed out of the room and slammed the door shut, leaving Armin alone in the room with his unconscious friend.

***

The bright light of the morning sun was shining through the large windows of the small sterile room on the intensive care floor- and Armin would have died due to excessive concern if it wasn't for the weak hand resting on his head. 

His eyes shot open and he raised his head, only to be met by a pair of gloomy icy-blue orbs. She offered him a weak smile before her hand dropped. 

"You're awake," he murmured, getting up to hug her, trying his best to ignore the growing pain in his torso. "You really are awake." 

Annie snorted seeing him like that, but eventually wrapped her arms around him. 

"Why wouldn't I?" 

Armin nuzzled his nose in the crook of her neck, earning a low chuckle from the girl in his arms. Thank God, she was fine. 

But he had to make sure, so he started asking questions: how did she feel, did anything hurt, how did it even happen? She said that she was fine now and that he shouldn't worry about her. Regarding the last question, though, she was as confused as him. 

The last thing she remembered was having taken her pills and getting ready for dinner when her legs collided and her vision went blurry. She remembered falling, a burning sensation in her throat. Oh, and she knew for a fact Hitch burst into her room at the time, given her unmistakenly high voice. 

"So I'm in ICU," Annie said while Armin settled himself next to her and wrapped the blankets around her, making sure not to touch the cannula in her left arm. Then he lowered himself to kiss her forehead. 

"I'm sorry," he whispered. "For being late last night." 

"Don't be," she said, pulling his nose. "I wouldn't have wanted you to see me like that." 

"But I promised I'd be there and-" 

"You're here now. That's all I care about," she said, offering him a side-smile. 

"But still-" 

"Stop that," Annie scolded. "I don't feel like listening to you bringing yourself down today." 

Armin was about to complain again when the door was opened and doctor Hange walked in with Hitch right behind them. 

"Good, you're up!" they greeted, then turned to Armin and offered him a considerate smile. "Thanks for watching her, Armin." 

Armin nodded slightly and got up, waving towards Annie in the process. 

He went to his bay and as soon as he closed the door he got a text from his mother, apologizing for missing his birthday due to having to travel to another city with work. He wasn't even surprised. 

Armin collapsed on the bed and closed his eyes. He had an appointment in two hours and, like, 5 assignments due to that afternoon. Great. That was definitely not how he had wished to celebrate his 18th birthday.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> （・◇・）


	17. Happy Birthday

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **SURPRISE!** I'm still alive.

"You came again?" Armin heard as soon as he closed her door. 

He peeked an eye to the blonde lying on one side in the hospital bed, her hair spread across the pillow, a white blanket covering her petite body, a transparent liquid making its way into her small arm through some tiny wire. 

"Shouldn't you be with your friends now, celebrating your anniversary instead of wasting your time with some hospitalized sick idiot?" Annie scolded after he had sat down on the edge of her bed. He took her free hand in his and squeezed it lightly, a gentle smile on his face. 

"And a very good afternoon to you too, Annie," 

She sighed heavily and buried her face in the pillow. 

"Yeah, I guess that's how a conversation should start, right?" she muttered, interlacing her fingers with his. "Sorry. Would you mind coming in again?" 

Armin tilted his head a little, somehow confused by her request, but eventually got up and out the door, only to come in again after ten seconds. Annie waited until he closed the door. 

"Hi," she said when he sat on the edge of the bed once again. "Why aren't you with your friends now, celebrating your anniversary instead of wasting your time with some hospitalized sick idiot?" 

The boy rolled his eyes and bent down to kiss the side of her head. 

"You're not an idiot, Annie." 

"No, I just kept smoking, knowing full well that it's gonna affect my health," she said in a low voice. 

"This doesn't mean-" 

"It does," she cut him off. 

"You know you're worth it, right? Don't let anyone tell you otherwise," he whispered in her ear, a mocking smile playing on his lips. 

Annie narrowed her eyes at him and pinched his nose. 

"Are you quoting me right now?" 

Armin giggled at her and smooched the side of her head, earning a low chuckle from his friend. 

"You told me that when we first met," he said. "No, sorry, when I first got here," he corrected himself, thinking back to the day he found out that they used to hang out in middle school. "And you made me extremely happy back then." 

Annie side smiled and slowly sat up, then brushed a strand of stray hair from his forehead and placed a soft kiss on his cheek. 

"Happy birthday, Armin," she said and leaned her head on his shoulder. He hummed in response and embraced her, placing his chin on top of her head. 

"How do you feel?" he asked, stroking her back. 

She shrugged her shoulders and sank her face further into the crook of his neck, earning a low groan from Armin. She hastily straightened herself and looked at him with wide eyes, his pained grimace making her think that she did something wrong. 

"It's no-nothing," he said between coughs, but Annie didn't buy it. She rose a questioning eyebrow and Armin's attempts to shove it away soon became futile against her glare. "My ribs are not showing the progress Mister Zacharias was expecting to see and they started to hurt more lately," he breathed out. 

She pressed her lips together and leaned her back against the headboard. She felt a little guilty for having the poor guy sleep on a chair by her bedside, although she knew he wouldn't have gone to his own bay until he made sure she was fine. 

"You're not using your crutches though," she noted. 

The look on Armin's face was priceless. His eyebrows furrowed for the slightest second before his mouth dropped in realisation and he slapped his cheek. 

"I forgot them," he murmured. 

"How can you forget something indispensable?" Annie questioned, a grin on her face. 

"I…don't know," he admitted, rubbing the back of his head, embarrassed. He diverted his gaze and saw the bowl on the tiny table next to the bed. "Is that your dinner?" 

Annie nodded slightly and arranged the pillows behind her back so she could sit more comfortably. Armin silently watched her, a slight blush creeping in his cheeks. 

"Would you mind if I fed you?" 

Now it was Annie's turn to blush. She looked at him with wide eyes, thinking that she had heard him wrong. 

"I mean…" he bit his bottom lip, "I thought your hands might hurt and-" 

"Sure." 

"Really?" Armin's face lit up and his eyes brightened. 

He leaned forward and grabbed the pot of soup which was almost cold and got closer to Annie. She made a face after swallowing the first spoon. 

"I bet it's terrible," he sympathized, bringing another spoonful to her mouth. She sighed slightly and took it in, swallowing again. 

"I hate it," she groaned before Armin fed her another spoonful of soup. 

"The soup?" 

"Being locked in a hospital," she said in a low voice. "I mean-" he brought another spoon to her mouth, "-girls my age are going out every night and having fun with their friends and fighting with their fathers for coming home late and I'm just locked here and I hate it," she let out and leaned her head against the wall. 

Armin shoved a spoonful of soup in her mouth, his lips pressed together. 

"And this soup is horrible," she added. 

"That's such a shame," came Hitch's voice from the entrance. "I'll tell Nifa you don't appreciate her efforts of cooking something edible and nutritive just for you," she said in a teasing tone, walking towards Annie with a bag of transparent serum in one hand. 

"Please don't," the blonde asked in an indifferent voice. 

The nurse began to work on replacing the emptied bag of serum with the new one. She kept babbling about Annie's well-being and how she scared everyone to death the other day, praising Armin for being so protective and not leaving his girlfriend's side until she opened her eyes. By the time the medical worker was done administrating Annie her treatment, Armin had turned as red as a tomato. He breathed a sigh of relief when she took the bowl of soup from his hands and headed for the door 

"Oh, and-" Hitch turned around, a grin on her face, "-there's a bunch of kids waiting for you on the outside," the young woman opened the door and let their friends in before getting out. 

"Happy Birthday!" they all exclaimed, Connie and Eren blowing confetti while Krista held a birthday cake in her arms, Mikasa trying to stop Sasha from grabbing a piece of chocolate, and Ymir supporting Pieck so she could stand up straight. Jean and Marco were also there, each holding a present bag. 

Armin's mouth dropped and he had to rub his eyes to make sure it was true. And it was. His friends had gone out of their way to surprise him on his birthday and he couldn't be more grateful. Their gesture left him speechless and made him feel loved and appreciated. 

"Are you crying, Ocean-boy?" Connie asked, a teasing smile playing on his lips. 

He shook his head in a poor attempt to deny it, saying he got something in his eyes. 

"Aww," Eren ruffled his childhood friend's hair. "He got _emotive_." 

" _Emotional,_ " Jean corrected in a matter-of-factly voice. 

"Shut up you horse-face!" 

"Make me, Yeager," the other grunted, clenching his fists. 

"You're both wrong," Mikasa interrupted. "Besides, we're here to celebrate Armin's birthday, not fight with each other." 

The two boys apologized and promised to try and get along for one night. 

Krista placed the cake on the bed table and began to cut it into big slices as the others sat around the room. 

"Sorry you don't have anything to blow, we couldn't find any candle," she said as she handed him a plate. 

"Thank you," Armin muttered, wiping his eyes with the back of his sleeve. He took a forkful of chocolate cake and hummed. "This tastes great. Thanks." 

"Don't thank us," Pieck said while taking a seat on the couch across the room. "It was Annie's idea." 

He turned to the blonde next to him with an excited expression on his face and took hold of her hand. 

"Really?" 

She blushed slightly and looked down, playing with his fingers.

"Well-" 

"Yes, it was her idea," Ymir confirmed as she sat beside Pieck and took a bite of her piece of cake. 

Annie opened her mouth, trying to say something, but Armin was quick to cover it with his own, to everyone's surprise. 

"Would you like to be my girlfriend?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wonder what her answer will be :3


	18. Hoodie

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This actually happens two years before the actual story and it has little to no relevance to the plot.
> 
> A little side-story for Annie's hoodie. In which the dead has a word to say.

It was a cloudy late-autumn evening when they got together again. Though the circumstances might have not been that friendly, since he had fainted in history and she was getting ready for the surgery the next day, they still found some time to get on the roof and catch up. 

"I don't see myself grow up," Berthold said as he climbed the ledge of the roof. The brunet threw his arms to his sides, trying to keep his balance. 

He smiled widely, his green eyes sparkling. The wind was blowing in his face, the sky looked as if the clouds were on the point of breaking, clear blue mixing with darker colors, the world beneath them so small yet so busy. 

"You're gonna fall," the blonde said tonelessly. She grabbed his hand with her own unsteady one, making sure it wouldn't be the case. 

Berthold offered her a gentle smile and interlaced his fingers with hers, admiring the sight of this petite yet ferocious girl that he loved so much. 

"You're trembling," he noted. "Is it the cold or..." 

Annie could clearly see his hesitation. Even after all those years, he still couldn't bring up her disease without looking somehow turned off by the simple name of it. 

"...the thing?" he eventually asked, arching a brow in her direction. 

"Friedreich’s ataxia," she said quietly. "It's called Friedreich’s ataxia." 

He looked away and made a few tiny steps ahead. 

"Right," he said. "Friedreich’s ataxia." 

The two of them kept silent for some time, making small but safe steps ahead. 

Annie could feel the cold breeze go through her frame and attempted to tighten her jacket around her, which was pretty much futile. 

She looked up at him and observed his appearance. A rather skinny boy for his height, his white hoodie swinging on him as on a hanger, his tan-ish complex looking as sick as ever, the black circles around his emerald eyes darker than she could remember, his cheekbones more prominent than the last time she had seen him. 

He was an outstanding student, there was no other better than him. He had his whole life ahead of him, he could have done literally anything. Except, anorexia kept getting in his way, so he spent most of his time in the hospital. 

"You shouldn't be here," she said quietly. 

Berthold stopped in his spot and looked down at her, his lips pressed together, his eyes widening for the slightest second. Then he smiled and went back to walking on the ledge of the hospital roof, using his beloved friend's hand as support. Or just holding it so she wouldn't have to worry about him falling over. 

"You keep saying that." 

"Because it's true," she stated in a definitive voice. 

The boy looked somehow saddened by her affirmation. 

"You shouldn't be here, Bert," she said, squeezing his hand a little too hard. "You should be home right now, enjoying a cup of hot cocoa and looking for universities that could suit your talents instead of wasting your time in this shitty place because you just won't fucking eat!" she snapped. 

"But it's still not enough," he muttered. 

"What?" 

"It's not enough," he repeated. "It doesn't matter how much I starve myself or how much I work out, it's still not enough for them," he carried on, his voice brittle. "They still won't accept me." 

His arms fell as he let go of her hand. He sat down on the pavement and took in a shaky breath. 

"They still see me as that small chunky boy." 

Annie sighed and sat down next to him. 

"Who cares what they think." 

"I do," he mumbled, looking down at his shoes. 

"If I were to listen to everyone's opinions, I shouldn't have been born." 

"Who said that?" he narrowed his eyes. 

"My mother." 

"Well, your mother could go and drop herself in a river." 

"Your bullies could do the same," she said, a small smirk on her face. 

"You're not wrong," he snorted. 

"Then why do you keep doing that?" 

"I don't know, I just- I can't get their words out of my mind," he blurted out. "I look in the mirror and all I see is what they've said about me." 

"What they said about you is strictly their problem." 

"Well, yes, but-" 

"They have issues themselves and take it out on you. It doesn't mean there's something wrong with _you_ , but with them." 

Berthold sighed heavily and dropped his head in his chest. 

"I'm an easy target." 

"Yes," the blonde said, playfully punching his shoulder. "You should fight back more often." 

Berthold smiled to himself and began playing with his fingers. How lucky he was to have such friends. Annie and Reiner had accepted him since day one when they basically stormed into his bay to say hi and had to be escorted out by an annoyed nurse Petra. Over the years they had become really close, closer than he had ever been to anyone else. 

The brunet looked up at Annie, who had begun shaking badly, the tips of her fingers turning from white to purple. She tried to hug herself, probably hoping to get warmer, but her thin jacket wasn't helping. 

"Now I'm pretty sure it's the cold," he said as he pulled his hoodie over his head, revealing the green blouse beneath it. 

He carefully pulled it down her petite body and covered her lemonish hair with its hood. 

"You didn't need to," she said in a small voice, blushing slightly. 

He shrugged his shoulders and smiled, his eyes sparkling. 

"You're freezing," he said. "Come on, let's get you inside." 

Berthold helped her to her feet and they walked together towards the door leading to the staircase. He kept it open for her and patiently closed it once she got inside, making sure to not make much noise so the nurses wouldn't hear them.

And he never got his hoodie back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aghhh, I'm such a troll. I'm sorry. I'll *try to* update the chapter with her answer this week.


	19. Happy Birthday part 2

_"Would you like to be my girlfriend?"_

For the slightest second, Annie considered slapping him hard enough to swallow his tongue. Too bad the others were there, waiting for her answer. She instead gave his hand a harsh squeeze and lifted the corner of her lips upwards. She leaned closer to him, her shoulder pressed against his. 

"Shouldn't we talk about this in private?" Annie breathed in his ear, quietly enough so the others wouldn't hear. " _Sweety_?" she added in a playful voice, making Armin's face burn. 

She backed off and sank back in her pillows, a slight smile on her face, and pinched his nose. 

"So?" Jean asked leaning forward, a smirk on his face. 

Armin stared at Annie, realizing how badly he fucked up, asking her in front of everyone. She must have been really pissed off. 

_You just couldn't keep your mouth shut, could you?_

The door swung open and Reiner walked in, his arms filled with bottles of soda and packets of plastic glasses. 

"Did I miss anything?" he handed the bottles to Krista and began working on getting the glasses out of the plastic bag. 

"Armin just-" 

"He was expressing his gratitude," Annie cut Jean off, earning a glare from Mikasa. 

"He wasn't expecting us to come at all," she played along. "He's in awe that we managed to make it." 

The taller blond grinned widely and ruffled his hair. 

"Of course they came," he said, making Armin chuckle. "They're your friends, right? That's what friends do." 

The young man grinned widely, though Armin could swear he saw his eyes getting wet for the slightest second. He heeled around to take the plate Krista was holding out for him before he sat next to the others. 

"Would you like some, Annie?" Krista asked as she cut another piece of cake. 

"I can't, I'm sorry," the blonde shook her head. 

"I want some," Sasha stated, putting her arm up. 

"You're not supposed to be eating cake. Especially not with chocolate," Connie reminded her, taking a bit of his own slice. 

"Zeke doesn't have to know." 

She looked at his plate with wishful eyes. 

"No." 

"But!" she leaned towards him and attempted to grab the plate, but Connie was quick to raise it above his head. 

Sasha narrowed her eyes and started climbing on him, doing everything in her power to get to that plate of holy cake and at least taste it. But Connie wasn't less determined than her, he only wanted to eat the rare thing at peace. 

"Do they do this every day?" Eren asked as Connie tried to push his hungry friend away, ranting about how she shouldn't deviate from her program. The relaxed way everyone was just watching them amazed Eren. 

"Kinda," Ymir said. 

"Come on, Sasha, what part of _no cake_ don't you understand?" Connie snapped, annoyed. 

"Just one tiny bit-" 

"If you keep ignoring what the doctor says you'll end up just like Berthold!!" 

Sasha stopped her movements and plopped on the cushion next to him, her eyebrows furrowed. Ymir's eyes shifted to him, her hand on Krista's shoulder tightened. Armin could feel Annie tense up next to him, her eyes widening for the slightest second. He grabbed her hand, offering her a reassuring smile. 

Reiner clenched his jaws, his fist tightly gripped the plastic spoon. _Berthold._

That name still rang in his ears as if it had happened yesterday. 

The day they stormed into the new kid's bay to friendly welcome him. The way he shyly waved before he dropped his head, how Petra shoed them out in order to give the boy some peace. How he showed up in the cafeteria a few days later and Marcel got him to their table. How he would keep staring at his food every time he sat with them. How he would say he was alright and smile every time they asked. 

How desperate and panicked he was when they found Annie on the floor, bruised and bloody after her father's visit. How he dropped dead that morning, two months after the incident. 

All those memories came back to his head like a hurricane and hit him in the feels. 

The sound of a plastic spoon being snaped in half broke the silence in the room. 

"How dare you," Sasha yelled as she jumped to her feet, tears starting to roll on her cheeks. She stormed out of the room and shut the door close. Connie ran right after her, trying to apologize for what he had said. 

"I'm getting out tomorrow," Krista said in an attempt to divert the others' attention. 

Annie rose her head and offered her a small smile, her eyes vacant. 

"Congrats," she said calmly. "May you never come back as a patient." 

"May your mouth be golden," Ymir added, raising her eyes to the ceiling. 

"The doctor said I'll be out soon too since my burns are mostly healed," Marco announced, his smile to his ears. 

"Same as Krista: don't come back." 

"I'll take care of that," Jean said, putting his arm around his shoulders and drawing him closer, earning a low chuckle. 

Eren rolled his eyes, though he couldn't help but smile. 

"When will you be out, Armin?" Mikasa asked while putting her plate away. 

The blond looked at her and smiled. 

"I'm not sure," he admitted. "The doctor said he'll keep me here a little longer, to make sure my ribs are fine." 

"And your arm?" 

"My arm's fine," he said with a shrug, pulling his sleeve past his knuckles. 

"If you say so." 

The door swung open and Hitch leaned against its frame, some papers in her hands. 

"I'm sorry, kids, but visitation time is over." 

"Are you kidding?" Eren asked, turning his head in her direction. "It's been less than 20 minutes!" 

"I don't make the rules," she said as she rose her hands above her head. "Besides, Annie needs her rest." 

"Right." Reiner rose from his spot and walked to his blonde friend; he ruffled her hair and smiled gently. "We've probably tired you up, haven't we?" 

"Nah, that was cool," Annie said, trying to put her hair back in place. 

"Happy birthday again, Armin," the man said, turning around to ruffle the boy's hair. "Take care," he added. 

_Take care of her for me_ , his eyes said. 

Armin nodded slightly and got to his feet when Annie caught his hand with hers. He looked down at her and noticed her pink cheeks, her big eyes begging him to stay. 

Krista hugged the two blondes and wished them well before she got out, Ymir followed suit. Pieck waved at them and slowly left the room. Mikasa got to her feet and put her red scarf around her neck as Eren was looking for his father's number in his phone. 

"Don't bother the man," Jean spoke out while getting up and dressing his coat. "I'll give you a lift." 

"As if-" 

"Thanks," Mikasa said. She then turned to Armin to hug him. "Get well soon, okay? We miss you." 

"I'll try." 

She turned to Annie and put her hand on the blonde's shoulder. "You too." 

"It's not that easy for me," she said sadly. 

Marco and Jean wished him a happy birthday and walked out, Eren and Mikasa right after them. They left the gift bags on the cushion, telling Armin to open them when he felt like it. 

The nurse said she'd be back in a few minutes and left to get Annie's medicine, closing the door behind her. 

Armin turned to Annie and tried his best to smile. 

"Annie, I-" 

She threw her arms around his neck and buried her face in his shoulder, catching him by surprise. 

"I'd like to," she said. 

His eyes widened in realization and his mouth dropped. He cupped her cheeks in his hands and searched her sparkling eyes, his smile growing bigger every second. 

"Really?" 

The blonde brushed her lips against his in response, sliding her hand through his soft hair. 

"Really," she whispered before kissing him once again. Armin encircled his arms around her waist, earning a low moan from his girlfriend. He smiled against her lips and drew her closer, impossibly closer, enjoying every second of it.

And it would have been perfect, were they not interrupted by a shouting and slightly annoyed Hitch.


	20. Water globe

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Haha, Christmas is comming and I'm still not done with Armin's birthday.

"No way you found it!" 

Armin put the gift-paper aside and looked at the red cover of the book he's been looking for half a year, amazed that he finally got to touch it with his own two hands. 

"How?" he asked as he switched his attention to his laptop's screen, where his friends' smiley faces were. 

"We were a bit lucky," Eren said, shaking his hand before his camera. Mikasa nuzzled herself closer to him and smiled at Armin's happy expression. He looked like a little kid opening his Christmas gifts. 

Armin carefully caressed the hardcover before slowly opening the book and bringing it to his nostrils, inhaling the unique scent of new book pages. 

"Guys, this is amazing. Thank you," he said as he put the book on the nightstand, next to the other presents he had received: a sweater, a calligraphy pen, a mug, and a growing pile of books. 

"There's one more," Mikasa said, a small grin on her face. "This time from Annie." 

"Really?" 

Armin smiled widely and grabbed the last present: a simple square light-blue gift box. _His favourite color._ He looked at it for a couple of minutes, contemplating whether he should open it or not. 

"Don't you wanna know what's inside?" he heard Eren's voice from the other end. "I don't think she'll get mad if you open it without her." 

He nodded eagerly before taking the top of the box off. His mouth dropped in awe and his eyes grew bigger, his heart started beating faster and faster, threatening to jump out of his chest. 

"It's a water globe!" he exclaimed, examining its glass surface. He looked at the small buildings and the sandy surface near them, followed by something blueish, his eyes glowing with joy as he slowly realised what the water globe held inside. 

"It's the ocean!" 

"Really? Let me see!" Eren asked. 

Armin held his little prize in front of the camera, his smile growing impossibly larger every passing second. 

And that's when he noticed the sticky note on the bottom of the water globe. He took it off and looked at it with curiosity, observing Annie's small handwriting, the letters curving next to each other as if they were dancing. 

He heard Mrs. Jeager call Eren to dinner and assured his friends that it was fine and they could talk in the morning. He shut his laptop down and got up to put it on the table. Once back in bed, he took the water globe in his hands and began reading Annie's note, the knot in his throat tightening at every word, tears threatening to roll down from his eyes.

_"To one of the coolest dudes I've ever known,"_ it read. 

_"I'm so glad you're still around. You're amazing. Really. Don't let anyone bring you down.  
May you have a happy birthday, _

_Your little duck friend."_

"Armin," Petra sneaked her head inside his bay, taking the blond by surprise. He quickly wiped his eyes and folded the piece of paper, putting it and the gift back in the box. "You're being too loud and it's pretty late," the nurse said. "Come on, tug yourself in bed, and go to sleep." 

"Can I go and see Annie first?" he asked, feeling the sudden need to hold her in his arms. 

"Not now." 

"But-" 

" _No_. You go to sleep now and you can visit her in the morning. They will have brought her back on this floor by then." 

His face brightened hearing that she'd be out of ICU soon and let the nurse cover him with the blankets, anxious for the morning to come.

***

The short man in a blue suit walked into the building, leaning in his cane for support, a black hat covering the few hairs he got on his head. He smiled kindly at the secretary who had just greeted him, his eyes vacant, and continued to walk towards the wooden door at the far end of the corridor, knowing full well who was behind it and what awaited him once he had stepped into that room. He checked the name written on the door and knocked three times. It wasn't much until the one inside called for him to come in. He took the handle in his plumpy hand and slowly opened the door. 

"How can I help you?" the blonde man asked, not raising his eyes from his papers. 

"I need your help," he said, closing the door behind him. 

The young lawyer flinched visibly when he recognized the man's voice. He put his pen down and rose to his feet, finally looking at that old man he hated so much. It amazed him that the man had the guts to come there after everything that had happened. 

"If you're here because of Annie, she doesn't want to see you," Reiner said in a definitive voice, his eyebrows furrowed. 

"You could convince her," the other said, getting closer to his desk. 

Reiner shook his head and turned around to grab some folders from the shelf. 

"She's an adult now. She can do whatever she wants to."

"But I'm still her father," the man said, taking the seat in front of the desk. 

"Legally speaking, _sir_ , you're nothing for her." Reiner sat down again and began looking through the folder. "I have the full custody," he added before taking a sip of his coffee. "Now, if you can excuse me, I'm having a meeting with my client." 

"At least tell me where she is," the man asked, a desperate tone in his voice. 

"If she wanted you to know, she would have told you." 

Mister Leonhart rose to his feet, his lips pressed together, and left the room without another word. 

Reiner buried his face in his hands and breathed out a sigh of relief, though he couldn't help but wonder what that man was capable of.

***

"Do you need anything else?" Hitch asked, handing Annie the glass of water. 

The blonde nodded and took a sip before giving the glass back and leaning against the headboard. Her headboard. After running a few more tests, Hange had said that she was stable enough to be sent back in her own bay and there she was. 

"Can I have some pudding?" 

"It has milk," Hitch stated. 

"And?" 

"You're allergic." 

"And?" 

The nurse rolled her eyes. "What if you have another allergic reaction? You'll end up in intensive care again." 

The blonde eventually gave up on the idea of having pudding and requested some oranges instead, though they couldn't be found in the hospital either. 

"Well," Hitch said approaching the door, "I'd better go and start my quest of finding some oranges." 

She opened the door and was taken by surprise by a yelping Armin. Hitch grinned widely and patted the boy's shoulder, then muttered something about entertaining his girlfriend before eventually leaving the two of them alone. 

"Hi," Armin greeted as he walked towards Annie. 

"Hi," she said, her cheeks flushed. 

"How do you feel?" 

"With my hands," she deadpanned. 

Smiling, he sat on the edge of the bed and took her hand in his. He started rubbing circles on her knuckles, watching her pale complexion slowly getting colored with pink shades. Annie raised her head to meet his eyes, quite pleased with the joy they radiated. 

"I got the water globe," he eventually said, bringing her hand to his lips. "Thank you." He brushed his lips against her bony fingers, then her palm, her wrist, he started placing kisses up her arm, slowly lifting the sleeve of her white hoodie while doing so, earning low chuckles from his girlfriend. 

"You're the amazing one, you know? You got me out of that low, dark place and made me want to live again." Armin let go of her hand and hugged her, stealing a little kiss on the lips. "I have no idea how you did it, but I'm grateful. I'm so grateful that you exist." He leaned his forehead against hers and smiled. "My little duckling." 

Annie wrapped one arm around his torso and tangled the other in his golden hair, a joyful smile playing on her lips. She closed her eyes and listened to his heartbeat, feeling his chest lightly pressed against hers. They stayed in silence for a while, just enjoying each other's presence, listening to the other's breath. Being at peace.

And then the phone rang.

Annie sighed heavily as Armin tightened his hold on her, both opening their eyes at the same time. 

"That will be my father." 

"Maybe it's Reiner," Armin guessed, full of hope. 

The blonde shook her head. 

"He's at work now." 

Armin pressed his lips together and stretched his hand towards the nightstand to grab the phone and hand it to her. 

Annie stared at the screen as her father kept calling, unconsciously chewing the inside of her cheek. It was pretty obvious now that he wanted _something_. He wouldn't keep calling so often if he didn't want something, would he? Did he need money? Did he just want to vent on someone? 

"Why don't you answer?" Armin questioned. "Maybe he just wants to know how you're doing." 

"Do you think I should? After everything that happened?" Annie rose her eyes to meet his, looking suddenly exhausted. 

Armin examined her face, trying to ignore the phone. She looked so week and fragile as if the simple reminder of her father's existence would have startled her to the bone. Her big eyes emitted fear, her once smiley lips were now trembling slightly. She looked like a cornered animal waiting for the hunter to shoot. 

"You're still afraid of him, aren't you?" He took her shaking hand in his and caressed it gently, offering her a reassuring smile. 

"He almost killed me," Annie muttered. 

"You could file for a restraining order. You could even press charges against him. I think you'd have pretty big chances to win a trial." 

The moment the phone stopped ringing Annie breathed a sigh of relief. The room went silent and they kept it that way, waiting for her to calm down. Armin cupped his girlfriend's face in his palms and lightly brushed his lips against hers, taking Annie by surprise. 

"Reiner could represent you in court. I could be one of the witnesses, since I've been here when he had tried to call," he carried on, more enthusiastic with every word. "You could be free of this labor he's been putting you through in less than a year and-" 

"I would have to see him for an entire year?" Annie asked, her voice throaty. 

Armin stopped mid-sentence, finally seeing her main issue, _facing him_. Having to be in the same room as him. Having to confront her abuser, even with a bunch of people supporting her and guards assuring her safety. 

"I don't want to see him at all," Annie said, digging her nails in her palm. She shook her head to push his hands away, a few stray strands of hair falling on her face. "I don't want to have anything to do with him." 

"With who?" Hitch's voice could be heard from the doorway. 

Annie rose her head and tried to put the neutral face on while Armin turned around to face the nurse as well. She closed the door with her foot, five giant oranges and a bowl in her hands. 

"Is your father bugging you?" she asked as she placed the fruits on the nightstand. Hitch took a small penknife out of her coat's pocket and began to peel the oranges. 

"Maybe," the blonde admitted, tugging a stray strand of lemonish hair behind her ear. 

"Why do you let him?" 

Hitch gave her a slice of orange and asked Armin if he wanted some too. He turned it down at first but reconsidered once Annie had asked him. 

"What can I do anyway?" the blonde asked, looking at the medical worker. 

"You could start by blocking his number," she pointed out. 

Annie's eyes widened and her mouth dropped. Armin tried to fight a snicker, seeing her troubled expression. 

"Can I do that?" the blonde turned to him. 

"Yeah," he said. "He won't be able to call you or send you messages afterwards." 

"Really?" Annie's eyebrows rose. 

"Yes, Annie. It's called-" Hitch raised her hands in the air, "- _technology_." 

"How do I even do that?" 

"I can show you," Armin offered. 

"Do that and then go back to your bay," Hitch said as she wiped the penknife's blade clean. "Petra was asking for you." 

"What for?" the blond asked while typing something on Annie's phone. 

"I think your parents came to visit you a little earlier and couldn't find you or something." 

Armin hummed in response and handed Annie her phone. He grabbed her chin and planted a soft kiss on her lips before rising to his feet. 

"I'll come again later." 

"Let's have lunch together," the blonde blurted out. 

"Sure," Armin agreed, smiling. 

"See you," Hitch said, giving her patient a farewell hug. 

The two of them waved their hands at the sick girl as they left the room, closing the door behind them.

Armin was about to leave for his bay when the nurse placed a hand on his shoulder to stop him. He turned around and looked at her, confused. 

"Can I have a word?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Is it too late to say that I changed their ages? I honestly forgot to mention it until now *facepalm*. Here, Reiner and Pieck are 26 and Hitch is 24. Connie and Sasha are in their last year of high school. Bert was 20. The others are as old as in the manga. And I am stupid.


	21. Lunch went wrong

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Um... this might be triggering, I guess?
> 
> You've been warned.

"My parents didn't come to visit, did they?" Armin asked as soon as Hitch had closed the door of the nurses' office. 

She turned around to look at him, raising a brow at him. 

"What makes you think so?" 

"They're out of town," the boy shrugged. 

The nurse blinked in confusion and shook her head. 

"I didn't know that." 

"They got a phone call from someone important and had to leave yesterday." 

"On your birthday?" 

"Yeah?" 

"You mean it was their son's 18th birthday and they _had_ to leave town on the exact same day? Not to mention that you're in a hospital, you could use some support and love from your family." 

"No biggie," the blond said, stomping his foot on the ground. 

It took Hitch a solid twenty seconds to process what the kid was saying. He genuinely didn't see the problem, did he? 

"I'm sorry," she eventually said, leaning against the wooden door. 

Armin shrugged his shoulders and looked down, his shoes suddenly fascinating. 

"Did you tell them how you ended up here?" Hitch asked, studying him. 

Armin stayed quiet, his lips pressed together, his grip on the crutches tightening. 

"I think you should," the nurse carried on. "Just saying." 

"If you brought me here to lecture me on my poor life choices, don't bother," he snapped, anger in his eyes. 

"How did you get Petra to cover you, anyway? It's not like her to hide a patient's condition from his parents," she said, her eyebrows furrowed. 

_Is she serious?_ The blond opened and closed his mouth, giving up on the idea of arguing with her. He walked towards the door and reached for the handle when Hitch grabbed his arm. He angrily shoved it away, causing Hitch to take two steps back. 

"I don't wanna hear it," he stated, opening the door. 

"Wait!" the nurse ran in front of him, blocking the doorway. "It's not your parents I wanted to talk about. It's Annie."

***

"Armin," the girl tapped his hand, catching his attention. The boy turned his head to face his girlfriend. She smiled softly and squeezed his hand. "Are you okay?" 

"Yeah," he said, diverting his gaze. "I was just thinking...," he bit her lower lip, trying to come up with something, "I was just thinking how lucky I am that the other driver didn't press charges against me." 

He never even considered it. It was Hitch's words that put bim off, that one, insignificant shitty conversation that made him look at things from another perspective. 

_"She's sicker than she'll ever let you know,"_ the nurse had said. _"Her odds are kinda low, you know?"_ How he wished he hadn't heard that. Or what came next.

Annie tilted her head, trying to catch a glimpse of Armin's eyes. She could tell there was something bothering him, she just couldn't put her finger on it. She sighed and resumed to eating, though she couldn't take more than two spoons of soup. 

"How's your treatment going?" Armin heard himself ask. 

Annie blinked twice, put the spoon in the bowl and rose her head to face him. 

"Fine," she said, shrugging. "Doctor Hange changed my medications again, they hope these ones will show better results." She chuckled lightly, "Hopefully I won't end up in ICU this time." 

"Don't say that!" Armin snapped, his eyebrows furrowed, getting some old couple's attention a few tables away. 

Annie's eyes widened for the slightest second and Armin could swear he saw her flinch, something like fear flickering in her cristal-ish orbs. She lowered her head, bangs of lemon hair curtaining her face. 

"I'm sorry, I-" 

"You sound just like him," she muttered. 

"I'm sorry," he repeated, feeling somehow ashamed. He reached for her hand, but she shoved it away. 

"I'm done eating," the blonde said quietly. "Thanks for the food." She offered him a weak smile and rose to her feet. 

"Annie," he called her name, but she kept walking and left the canteen. 

Armin rose to his feet as well, grabbed his crutches and walked as fast as he could, trying to catch up with her. He made it just in time to see the elevator's doors close. 

The only way he could make it to their floor without waiting for the elevator to come back was by taking the stairs. And climb 6 stories by foot. _Good luck with that, Arlert._ Sighing, he started climbing.

***

She just couldn't stay there after he almost yelled at her. She just couldn't, it was too much, too familiar of a situation. Too close to what her father used to do, though she was sure Armin would never do anything to hurt her. Or she hoped so.

"Are you planning on getting out or...?" 

Annie's head snapped up and she was met with Connie's confused face. She looked around and only now realised that she had arrived on her floor. She hurriedly got out of the elevator when the other put his hand on her shoulder, making her flinch visibly. 

She could almost feel his big and plumpy hands on her, right before the storm. She could almost smell the alcohol, announcing the disaster that was coming. 

"I wanted to talk to you about-" 

"Later," Annie blurted out. She pulled away from his touch and rushed to her bay. 

She somehow managed to startle herself while closing the door too violently, causing a thousand of memories to come back, all at once. 

_His hands on her, his foot stomping her stomach._

Annie fell to the ground, shivering like a leaf.

_The way he used to throw her petite body on the floor, how he would bang her head against the wall._

She curled herself on the floor and covered her ears, digging her nails in them, hoping that the memories would go away.

_How he used to get mad every time she would ask him to stop drinking. "You ungrateful piece of shit!" he would yell, grabbing her hair. On good days, he would just keep yelling in her face, the disgusting smell of alcohol making her stomach flip, and then let her go. He would complain about everything he had done for her ever since she got sick and how lucky she was, he would go on and on about how easy it would have been for him to just let her on the streets and mind his own business, about how much she owed him for offering her the chance of a decent life._

Annie was now trembling badly, tears rolling down her cheeks, blood dripping from the back of her right ear where she had dug her nails. How she wished she hadn't remembered that. 

"I'm sorry," she muttered, frightened. "I'm sorry," she said, rocking back and forth. "I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm so sorry." She let out a couple of desperate sobs, trying to take some air in her lungs.

_The image of his cane right in front of her eyes._

"I'll be good, I promise," she whispered in agony. "I'll be good..."

_Too late. The familiar burning sensation on her cheek. The thud his cane made after making contact with her skin._

"Annie?" a soft and familiar voice came from the door. 

She rose her head just in time to see the door open and yelped when she noticed his cane. His... _two canes?_

Armin looked at his girlfriend with big eyes, surprised to see her curled up on the floor next to the bed frame, ears covered with hands, eyes red and teary. 

"What are you doing?" he whispered, closing the door and walking towards her. 

Annie stared at him, trailing further away with every step he made until she touched the nightstand. 

Armin stopped his movements and looked down, trying to figure what caused her reaction. She kept staring at his crutches, flinching every time they touched the ground, shivering like a leaf. He slowly placed them down, her eyes following his movements. The moment he removed his hands from them, Annie breath out a sigh of relief. 

"What's happening?" Armin whispered, kneeling down next to her. He studied her petite body, trembling and slowly rocking back and forth, her frightened eyes, her tear-stained cheeks, the red drops coming down her ear. "What's that?" he asked, reaching for her ear.

_His hand rising above his head._

"Don't," Annie mumbled, slapping Armin's hand away. 

His eyes widened and his mouth dropped when he caught a glimpse of the blood on her fingers. He quickly grabbed her wrist, causing Annie to yelp in fear and agony, and gripped it tightly, making it impossible for her to pull away. 

"I'll be good, I promise," she muttered, tears running down her cheeks, trembling worse than before. 

Armin kept his eyes on her bloody fingers, trying to figure where it came from. He remembered she had her hands on her ears when he had entered her bay, so the next thing he did was to raise his head and check her ears. And that's when he noticed the blood dripping from her right one. 

"Annie..." he tried to touch it with his other hand. 

_His big and plumpy hand. The loud thud it would make once it had touched her cheek._

"Don't touch me," she begged, pressing her shoulder against the nightstand and shielding her face with her free hand. " _Please_." 

Armin's hold on her wrist became softer, though he didn't let go. He got closer to her and, despite Annie's struggles to shove him away, put his arms around her shoulders. 

"Go away," she hissed, trying to push him. 

"It's gonna be fine, Annie," he tried to reassure her, gently caressing her hair. 

"Go. Away." Annie stomped her fist on his chest, causing his hurt ribs pain. 

He tightened his hold on her, completely ignoring her protests and pleadings. He couldn't just leave her like that. 

"Leave me alone," Annie said desperately, feeling weaker than ever before. She hated hurting him, she hated it, she hated herself for hurting him and she hated him for being so insistent. She planted her fingers in his shoulders and frantically pushed him away, though it was futile. "Please, Armin, let go, leave me alone," she begged, feeling the same way she did when she last saw her father. Cornered. Helpless. Desperate. 

"I'm trying to help you," Armin said, louder than he had wanted to, startling Annie. 

"You're not-" 

"Just calm down, will you?" The boy drew her closer and clenched his fist in her hair, earning a low cry from Annie.

_His hand in her hair._

Annie's hands dropped from his shoulders and she eventually gave up on trying to oppose him. It was futile anyway, he would just do his ways and completely ignore her protests. 

"Here, see?" Armin whispered, rubbing her back. He leaned his chin on her head and softened his grip on her hair. "It's okay." 

"...you're just like him," she muttered, feeling her cheeks drown in tears. 

Armin shook his head, his eyes widening for the slightest second. "I love you," he said before kissing the top of her head, making her shiver even worse.

_How he would always kneel next to her the following day and apologise for thousands of times as if it weren't his fault._

"...you're just like him..."


	22. Don't go

"Here you go," Armin said, putting the band-aid behind her ear. 

Annie nodded slightly and lowered her head, playing with her fingers. She was still shuddering a little and refused to talk, but she had stopped crying. 

"Are you feeling any better?" 

She shook her head, worrying Armin even more. Her behavior was weird, to say the least. She had been just fine during lunch and then _something_ made her lose her mind. And Armin was pretty sure he had caused the whole thing. 

"Do you want me to get Hitch?" 

She shook her head again. Armin looked at her small frame and narrowed his eyes, carefully choosing his next words. 

"Do you want me to leave?" 

Annie kept silent for a while, digging her nails in her palm, her lips pressed together. Seeing her lack of response, Armin rose to his feet and bent down to take his crutches back. He smiled slightly towards the blonde before turning his back at her and proceeded to start walking. 

"Don't go," he heard her throaty voice behind him. "Please don't go." 

He stopped in his spot and slowly turned around to look at her, a pained expression on his face. She kept her eyes on the floor, her bangs depriving Armin of seeing them, still slightly trembling. It hurt him to see her like that, small and scared and locked in herself. 

"I hate seeing you like this, Annie," he whispered, putting his crutches on the ground. 

"I'm sorry," she muttered, burying her face in her palms. "I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to." 

Armin sat down next to her and removed her shaky hands so he could cup her face.

_His hands on her_.

He wiped her tears with his thumbs and prompted her to look into his eyes, leaning his forehead against hers. 

"I'm not gonna hurt you, okay? I'm just trying to help. I care about you, Annie, so please don't push me away." The last part came out as a whisper, though he was sure she had heard him, for she nodded slightly. The blonde closed her eyes and let Armin do his ways. 

One of his hands left her cheek and undid her bun, her eyes slightly narrowing when he pulled the hair tie.

_His hand pulling her hair._

Moments later he retrieved his other hand as well, his forehead slowly removed from hers. She felt the mattress lift as he sat up and lid her eyes, surprised to see him kneeled down on the floor, working on untieing her snickers' lashes. 

"Thought you might use some sleep," he explained while removing her shoes. 

"You won't leave, right?" she asked, feeling somehow embarrassed for doing so since she had tried to shoe him out just minutes ago. 

Armin used the bed frame to stand up and pressed his lips against her forehead. 

"I can stay if you want me to," he said, prompting her to lay down. "Come on, Annie," he said when she shrugged his hand away. 

She slowly laid on one side and pulled the blanket over her shoulders, trailing further from the edge to make room for him. She stared at him with her big eyes until he eventually laid on his back next to her. 

"Want me to hold you?" Armin offered, extending one of his arms. 

She tried to smile and rested her head on his shoulder as he gently placed his palm on her shoulder blade, careful not to startle her again. 

"I'm sorry you had to see me like that," Annie muttered, closing her eyes. 

"I'm sorry for triggering you," he said, to which she responded with a low hum. 

In Armin's calming arms and listening to his rhythmic heartbeat, Annie quickly drifted to sleep. Her shivering died and her breathing calmed down, her chest slowly going up and down as her lover kept stroking her hair, occasionally kissing her forehead before he eventually fell asleep as well.

***

A couple of hours later, as the outside light was dying out, Annie flushed her eyes open to be met by Armin's warm smile. 

"Hi there," he greeted, bringing his hand to her forehead and brushing away a few stray strands of hair. "Did you sleep well?" 

She nodded slightly and slowly lifted herself so she could reach his lips, his eyes never leaving her. 

"Thank you, Armin," she said while bringing her hand to his cheek. "For everything." 

Annie lightly brushed her lips against his, quite pleased with the surprised noise that left him. His hand on her shoulder blade moved to the back of her neck and he encircled the other around her waist as he carefully flipped them both over. 

Their lips parted and Armin allowed himself a moment to just admire that precious being in his arms. Her lemon-ish hair spread across the white sheets, her crystal-like eyes sparkling in the dim light, no sign of fear shading them anymore, her lips slightly lifted upwards. 

Annie wrapped her arms around her lover and hugged him tightly, burying her face in the crook of his neck. 

"I love you," she whispered, clenching his shirt in between her fingers. "I love you so much." 

"I love you," he said, keeping her close.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy holidays to all of you!
> 
> Also thank you for sticking with me so far and for all your feedback, it has helped a lot.（’-’*)


	23. Fools and elevators

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Look at those two, being all cuddlly and fluffy. It'd be a shame if _someone_... ruined that.

"It was nice to see you, sir," Armin said as he opened the door. 

"Same here," Mister Church said, patting the boy's back. "Take care, kiddo. And give it some thought, okay? Don't rush to make a decision now." 

The blond smiled slightly and nodded before stepping out of the office. He said goodbye to the therapist and was about to take off when he noticed the petite girl across the hall, struggling to walk straight. _"She will soon not walk at all,"_ he recalled the nurse say. _"I'd appreciate it if you could help her get through it more easily."_

"Annie!" he called as he walked towards her. 

She almost jumped when she heard her name and tripped on her unsteady feet. Was it not for Armin's arms to catch her, she would have fallen flat on her face. She let a small sigh out and raised her head to meet his eyes, a tired expression on her face. 

"Easy now," he said, helping her to straighten up. "What are you doing here?" 

"I had a physical therapy session," she said, shoving his hands away. 

The blonde narrowed her eyes at him and attempted to walk again, only to trip after a few steps. This time though, Armin wasn't quick enough to catch her, thus she ended up on the floor. Annie groaned in pain and hugged herself, unable to get up. 

"I'm such a failure," she mumbled. 

"You're not," Armin said, kneeling next to her to caress her back. "You're just... tired." He so hoped to be right, he wished with all his being that she was only tired and would be fine after some good rest, though he couldn't help but worry. 

Annie faced him again and offered him a shadow of a smile, though her vision was playing her. Armin's worried face kept getting blurry, the room was spinning and she could swear she just heard a cat meowing somewhere. 

"Let's get you to your bay," Armin suggested, helping her stand up. 

The blonde encircled her arms around his free one, using it as support, and together they began taking small but steady steps ahead, getting closer to the elevator, though Annie kept tripping over and over. 

"I wish I could carry you," Armin reasoned once they got into the elevator, squeezing her hand. 

"Maybe one day you will," Annie said quietly as she nuzzled herself closer to him, a sad smile playing on her lips. 

The boy planted a kiss on her cheek and hugged her tightly, enjoying her warmth, inhaling her scent. Annie wrapped her arms around him as well and rested her head on his shoulder. 

"You still smell like cigarettes," Armin acknowledged, narrowing his eyes. 

"I haven't had one in weeks, don't ruin the moment," she muttered. 

Armin apologised and brushed his lips against her cheek again. An idea crossed his mind as they were waiting for the elevator to get on their floor, cuddled and with no one around. He bent down and pecked his girlfriend's neck, earning the cutest sound he had ever heard. 

"What was that?" Annie questioned, hiding her red face in his shirt. His motion felt so strange yet so... _incredible?_

Armin jerked back and locked his eyes on the floor, embarrassed of what he had just done, his face even redder than hers. 

With a rusty noise, the elevator's doors opened. The blonde encircled his arm again and they walked in silence towards Annie's bay, both red-eared. Once the door closed, Annie plopped herself on the bed and closed her eyes, without saying a word. 

Armin leaned against the door, not sure if he should stay or not. He didn't want to go though. He didn't want to just pretend nothing happened and forget about it. 

"I'm sorry for earlier," he said, approaching her. "I didn't mean to upset you." 

"You didn't," she muttered. 

Armin sat down next to Annie and watched her pained expression, her furrowed brows, her clenched fists. Something was definitely wrong. 

"My body hurts, that's all," she mumbled, hugging a pillow to her chest and burying her face in its cushion. 

Armin placed his hand on his girlfriend's shoulder, trying to reassure her. Annie curled into a small ball, squeezing the pillow even more. The two of them stayed in silence for some time, each pondering what to say next, how to chose their words so the other wouldn't be hurt, the only noises in the room being the wind blowing outside and the distant cry of a newborn. 

Eventually, Annie rose her head to meet his eyes and asked for some painkillers. 

"I'm having a surgery in December," she said, taking the glass of water from his hands. She gulped it all down, swallowing the pills. "If it goes well, I might be out before Christmas." 

"That's great, Annie!" the boy exclaimed, a huge smile on his face. He hugged Annie tightly, squeezing her a little too hard. When a low gasp left her lungs, he loosened his grip and apologised, hurriedly wiping the tears forming in his eyes. He felt kind of relieved, knowing there was still a chance that she'd get better. He felt like a burden was lifted from his shoulders. He was also enthusiastic about what could have been. "You'll get out and we can go on walks and dates and-" 

He stopped midsentence when Annie fell into his arms, her eyes closed, and muttered _'hug'_ before proceeding to nuzzle herself as close to him as she possibly could. 

"Yeah," Armin chuckled, wrapping his arms around her and resting his chin on her head. "We're gonna hug a lot."

*** 

The boy looked out the window at the snowed houses and white trees they were passing by. They were getting closer to the hospital and neither one of them had tried to start any conversation. 

"So..." Eren began, looking at his hands. "Mom was wondering if you're coming for dinner." 

His half-brother peeked a look at him, a small smile playing on his lips. 

"Do you want me to come for dinner?" 

Eren shrugged his shoulders and resumed to looking through the window. He honestly couldn't care less. 

The older man sighed. "I am on duty tonight. You know, for emergencies," he said as he got the car in the parking lot. "Maybe next week." 

Zeke parked the car and the two of them silently got out and walked towards the tall building. As they parted ways, each going to a different entering, Eren realised he had forgotten where his friend's bay was. He hurriedly turned around and called his brother, who arched a brow at him. 

"Do you happen to know where Armin Arlert is?" 

Zeke tilted his head and raised a hand to his chin, trying to remember. "Armin Arlert... the kid who tried to kill himself?"

Eren's green-ish eyes grew bigger when he heard the words, sheer horror taking over him as the terrible truth of his friend's condition hit him. The car crash wasn't an accident. The scars on his arms weren't from shattered glass. 

"The... the what?"

"I'll see you later then," Armin said as he waved towards his girlfriend. He got out of her bay, leaving her with the doctor which had come to check her condition. He started walking to his own bay, smiling to himself. Things seemed to finally come into place.

The boy panted heavily as he continued to run through the building. He couldn't believe it. There was no way his friend had tried to do that. He was _fine_! Armin was completely fine! He would never do something as reckless and... and _selfish_ as that. _Right?!_

Eren didn't even bother to apologise to that old man with a cane he had just bumped into. He kept running, aiming for the staircase.

The man walked into the elevator and pressed the button to the seventh floor, where he remembered his daughter's bay was.

Eren jumped three steps at a time, thousands of thoughts going through his mind. Why did he even _consider_ it in the first place?

The old man got out of the elevator and started walking, leaning in his wooden cane as if he couldn't keep his balance without it. A nurse asked if he needed help, but he declined it, he knew exactly where he was going. Third corridor, seventh door on the right. Taking a deep breath, he knocked twice.

The door was suddenly kicked open, startling the life out of Armin. He turned his head to be met by his friend's crouched frame, panting as if he had just run up a mountain. Eren raised his head and faced him, his eyes red and teary. 

"Did you try to fucking kill yourself?!"

Annie stood up on her unsteady feet and made her way to the door, smiling like a fool at the thought that her boyfriend came to visit her again. She eagerly opened the door, only to be met with the very person she had wished to never see again. _Her father._

Her smile died out, her eyes widened in fear. She could hear her heart, threatening to jump out of her chest. 

"Long time no see, Annie."


	24. Run

He used to make her pancakes every Sunday morning. They would eat together and then he would wash the dishes while little Annie would pick some flowers from the garden and put them in a vase. Whatever they would do next was totally up to her- on rainy days they would stay inside and play games or watch cartoons; on sunny summer days, they would go to the pond in the far end of the village and fish. 

One day she had asked her father to teach her how to swim and, since there wasn't much to do around the house, he had agreed. She was so enthusiastic, she didn't even wait for him to show her. She tied her hair into a small bun and dived into the water. If he hadn't hurried to get her out, she would have most likely drowned- but her laugher was priceless. 

One time she asked about the weird case she had seen in the basement, his grandfather's violin. At first, he didn't want to bring it out, but he eventually gave in after the little girl practically begged him to show her. So he did, he took the instrument out of its case and dusted it off before proceeding to play the few tunes he knew. It wasn't much, it didn't even sound good, but little Annie loved it. She wanted to play with those strings and bow too. 

Their lives were perfect. Taking that kid home had been one of Mr. Leonhart's best choices. He loved her, he wanted her to be happy, she was the apple of his pie. 

And one day she fell from her feet. He drove her to the hospital that day and held her small hand while the doctors collected blood for the tests. When the results came, he was devastated. Friedrich's Ataxia, a disease that couldn't be healed. The doctors said they could help his daughter cope with it, but there was nothing anyone could do to take it away. 

He started drinking. It wasn't that much, at first. One can of beer every night, after he would have put Annie in bed. Just one, to make it a little easier. Then Annie had her first surgery. It failed, if anything, it made things even worse. Annie didn't wake up and was put into an induced coma for a couple of weeks. 

No one had ever woken up from such a thing. He thought it was over, his little girl was gone. After years of treatment, she was gone. So he drank the pain away.

She did wake up, though, she woke up alone in a hospital room with wires going in her nose and arms and she was scared. She wanted her father, she wanted him to tell her everything was going to be fine and hold her in his arms. 

He didn't. He acted so cold and distant she couldn't even recognise him. Once they went back home, her father started drinking more and more, as if it was his new hobby. She didn't say anything at first, she just let him be. Then one night she tried to talk him out of having another beer and he lost it.

Now his daughter was standing before his eyes, looking at him like he was some kind of criminal. 

"I brought you some chocolates," he said, trying to break the silence. He stepped into the room, Annie went five steps back. "I remember you used to love them as a child." 

He closed the door and stretched his hand forward, meaning to hand her the little box. She just stared at him with big eyes and slowly sat down on the bed. 

She couldn't run, her feet wouldn't let her. She could only stay and hope for the best. Whatever that meant. 

Her father placed the box on the nightstand and sat down next to her. He tried to take her hand in his, she flinched once his skin touched hers and shoved it away, trailing further away from him.

_His hand, that used to bruise her skin._

The man sighed and looked down, a miserable smile playing on his lips. He knew he fucked up, he was just hoping there was still something he could do to fix their relationship, but Annie didn't seem to want the same thing. "Aren't you going to say anything?"

Annie raised her hands and covered her face. She slightly shook her head. She didn't want to talk to him, she didn't want to see him, heck, she didn't want to have anything to do with him. 

"What do you want?" she eventually asked, raising her head and facing him, her brows furrowed. 

He pressed his lips together and tightened his grip on the cane.

"Come home with me."

She didn't mean for that hysteric laugh to come out, she just couldn't keep it under. 

He couldn't be serious, there was no way in hell he was being serious about this after everything that had happened.

"Look, I don't know what I've done to deserve this kind of treatment from you, but-" 

"You were long wasted," she mumbled. Her father looked at her with sad eyes. "You came here and... and you were angry with me for something," she continued, trying to hold back the tears. "You beat me to a plump." She swallowed the knot in her throat, trying to clear her voice. She could almost feel the pain he had caused. 

Silence took over them. Neither of them knew what to say. He had no excuse- they both knew there was no excuse for what he had done.

Annie wanted to scream in his face, she wanted to let him know how he had made her feel, she wanted him to understand how much pain he had caused her. 

She also feared him. She knew how unstable her father was and she didn't want to risk it. 

"I can forgive you, dad," she muttered. "I get you weren't in your right mind. But don't expect me to trust you." 

Annie slowly stood up and walked towards the door. She opened it widely and gestured for him to get out. He didn't. He was starting to get on her nerves. 

"Annie, please, at least give me the chance to explain myself." 

"To explain- are you listening to yourself?" she snapped, slamming the door. "What's left to _explain_?! You fucked me up! I loved you, dad, you were the only person in this entire world that I could trust! And you fucked me up!"

Mr. Leonhart stood up as well, leaning in his cane for support. "And now I'm trying to fix it, but you just won't let me." 

"Oh, so it's my fault." 

The man tried to hold her hand again, but she slapped his hand away. 

"Don't you get it? I don't wanna have anything to do with you now, so please just leave me alone," she said in a low voice, her eyes bigger than ever. 

She was angry. 

She was angry and scared. 

She was shivering badly, and as much as she tried to mask it, she just couldn't. She wanted to get out- no, she wanted _him_ to get out. She was tired of running and hiding from him. She was tired of losing to him.

"You can't just push me away like that," he said, furrowing his eyebrows the slightest bit. "I'm your father, Annie, your family. I love you."

She shook her head and stepped back, avoiding him as much as possible. "They-" she gestured towards the door, past its wooden texture, "-they are the people who truly love me. They've been there for me and supported me when I needed them, they made me feel like I really matter, they helped me heal and cared for me for what I really am. They make me feel like home, they make me feel safe." She meant every word, every single one of them. "They are my family, not you. Heck, Reiner even went through the trouble of becoming my legal guardian just to keep me at shelter from you!"

"Watch your tone, young lady," he warned, clenching his fist on the cane. 

Annie smirked slightly, her back pressed against the wall. "Go ahead, yell at me. Tell me how much you hate me. Tell me how useless and stupid I am."

Well, that was daring as fuck. She should have known better. 

There came the loud thud his hand made when it lent on her cheek, followed by the familiar burning sensation. 

Annie moved fast. Faster than she ever thought she could. She dodged him and implanted her knee in his stomach just enought to make him choke. Just enough to give her time to flee. 

She ran. She shot the door open and ran down the white hall, hearing him shout her name. 

_Where on earth is Hitch?_

She ran down the stairs to the first floor, her breathing uncontrollable, her whole body aching. She hurried past the crowd of people buzzing around and aimed for the exit.

She wasn't safe there- she wasn't safe anywhere. So she just ran away until her legs were sore. She kept running long after leaving the hospital or its yard. She had no idea where she was going, but one thing was clear- she had to get away. 

She couldn't stay there and wait for others to help her this time. She couldn't lose them like she had lost Bertholdth. She couldn't let her father do that to them.

Thus, she kept running.


	25. Something's wrong

"They found a match, they found a match," the bald boy sang, pushing the button that held his floor's number. "They found a match and I'll finally be free." 

Connie leaned against the wall and smiled to himself. He was so happy to finally get that transplant and go home. He glared down at the box of cookies his mother had baked for him and opened it just enough to sneak one out. God, how he had missed her cookies.

The doors opened with a rusty noise and the boy hurried to leave, briefly catching a glimpse of the old man that entered the small elevator before the doors closed again, his eyes widening when he recognized him. 

"Shit."

***

The room was dead silent. The two boys sat on opposite sides of the couch, Armin facing the floor and Eren staring at his friend, his green eyes big as onions. 

"I'm sorry," Eren eventually said, getting closer to his friend. "I'm very, very sorry." 

The brunet put his arms around Armin's shoulders, taking him by surprise. He rested his head on his friend's shoulder and closed his eyes. "It's fine," he muttered. "I'm better now." 

"You always say you're fine," Eren scolded, tightening his grip. "I never thought- I would have never imagined-" 

"Eren, you're choking me." 

The boy frantically pulled away, forcing a laugh as he apologized. 

"You know, Mikasa said there was something wrong when we first visited you. She said your story didn't quite make sense to her." 

"Guess she was right." 

Eren narrowed his eyes. "Why, though?" 

Armin sighed heavily and ruffled his hair. "Can we talk about something else?" 

"Got it." 

The boy leaned back in the cushion and, after a moment of thinking, began telling his friend about what he was missing out on. 

He told him about the cat Mikasa had adopted and how well that little guy fit in the family. Eren also told him that they had to climb into the classroom by the window for a whole week because the key had been lost. Armin laughed when he pictured a whole herd of forty people climb in by that small window of theirs. 

And then Annie was brought up. 

"How are things going with your girlfriend?" 

The blond blushed slightly. "We're fine." 

"Fine how?" 

"Fine fine." 

"Oh, come on! I wanna know all the spicy details!" 

Armin snorted. "We kiss and cuddle. I sometimes read to her." A small smile played on his lips when he remembered the day she had fallen asleep while he was reading to her. "We talk a lot." 

"And?" 

"And what?" 

Eren tilted his head, an amused expression on his face. "And that's it?" 

"We were planning to watch a movie later," Armin said, confused. 

The brunet grinned widely and patted his shoulder, confusing him even more. 

"You know-" 

The door was suddenly opened and the two boys turned their heads towards it, to be met by Connie's freaked-out face. 

"What happened?" asked Armin. 

"She's not here?" Connie glanced around the room, frantically looking for someone, but she was nowhere to be seen. 

"Who?" 

"She's not here!" Connie hurried to get out, panicking more with every passing second. 

The two boys looked at each other before following him. They found him in the hall, stomping his fist on a door a couple of blocks away. 

A slightly annoyed Sasha opened the door, "What?" 

"Call Reiner," the bald boy said, walking past Sasha to check her room too. 

"What- why?" 

Armin leaned against the wall as Eren folded his arms on his chest, having no idea what was going on. 

Connie bit his thumb and proceeded to walk down the hall, only to change his mind and hurry back. 

"Call Reiner _now_ ," he told Sasha. 

"Maybe you could tell us what happened?" Eren suggested, growing quite annoyed with his act. 

"She's missing," he blurted out, looking miserable. 

Armin's eyes widened. 

"Who's missing?" Sasha asked, confused. 

_No_ , he thought. It couldn't be true. There was no way- 

"Annie's missing," Connie finally said, a sorrowful expression on his face. 

Armin could feel the ground collide under his feet as his world started falling apart once more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This took way too long and is way too short. My bad. 
> 
> I think we can all forget about the weekly update now, since it's not quite working *sigh*
> 
> Anyway. Thanks for reading! ^^


	26. Cold as snow

The snow was falling in small flakes over the little town, whitening the trees, the streets, the houses. The children were enjoying the first snow of the year, building snowmen and throwing snowballs at one another. 

They didn't have to worry about anything. They didn't have to worry about the gray clouds above them, or the weatherman announcing a snowstorm, or the blonde girl that ran past them, eyes red from crying and feet scratched, the only thing between them and the cold pavement being a pair of wet slippers.

***

It was almost like a deja-vu. 

The call. 

The panicked kid at the other end. 

The confusion, the feeling of being completely useless, of having failed his loved ones. The feeling of having failed to protect her once again. 

Reiner could hear the panic rise in Sasha's voice when she phoned to tell him about Annie's disappearance. 

And it angered him _so much_.

He jumped in his car and hurried to turn the engine on- but where was he heading? Where could she have possibly gone?

***

"What do you mean, she's missing?" Pieck asked for the tenth time, as Connie frantically searched her room again. 

"She's not here," the boy said, bending down to look under the bed. 

"We know what _missing_ means, idiot," Ymir grunted from the sofa. 

"Then stop asking stupid questions!" he snapped. Connie rolled on the floor and covered his eyes with his palms, letting a defeated sigh out. He had searched all of their friends' rooms and she was nowhere to be found. 

The door opened and Eren walked in, followed by a very worried Armin. 

"She's not at the canteen," Eren announced. 

"She's not at Reiner's either," Sasha said as she walked past him and plopped herself next to Ymir. 

Eren kept glaring at his friend, trying to figure out what was going on in his mind. His brows were furrowed, his eyes not focused, he kept playing with his fingers as if it would help him compose himself, as if it was the only thing keeping him from going nuts. He placed a hand on his shoulder and offered him one of his best smiles, trying to reassure him. 

"Maybe she's having a physical therapy session," Sasha suggested, a concerned tone in her voice. 

"She already had one." 

Sasha pressed ger lips together as Armin buried his face in his palms. 

"If her father was here-" 

"But I'm not sure _sure_ it was him," Connie said, sitting up. "I mean, I haven't seen him in over a year, I might have mistaken him with someone else." 

"I don't think you can mistake that guy," Ymir spoke up. 

Connie silently stood up and went next to Sasha, who started rubbing circles on his back in an attempt to calm him down.

The room was dead silent, each one of them searching their brains, trying to figure where their friend could have possibly gone. 

***

"Things have been really messy since you left." 

The blonde, which was sitting on a bench in the empty cementery, threw a rather small snow-ball at her late friend's stone. One year had passed since his death occurred, but she never got around to visiting his grave until now. 

Annie was panting heavily, her vision was blurry. There was a constant buzz in her ears and her whole body was aching. 

"There's a new guy on our floor, Armin. He took your room," she muttered, rubbing her hands together. "I think I talked about him back in middle school. He's changed a lot." 

She lowered her head and watched her freezing feet. Maybe running away in slippers hadn't been such a great idea. 

"He's taller now. His eyes aren't as bright as back then, but they're still beautiful. He's a pleasant company." The corners of her lips curled upwards. "He has fascinating stories. He's a nice person." 

Annie hugged herself, trying to ward off the cold. She rubbed her arms up and down, her body shaking slightly, her cheek aching. 

"Reiner seems better. He keeps himself busy," she said, fixing the stone with her eyes. 

She tried to picture him there, she tried to resemble his tall frame and tan-ish complexion, his green eyes, his brunet hair, the small smile he'd give her. 

But it was fruitless. His face had long faded from her memories, all that was left being a blurry image of a sick person. 

"Sasha will get out soon. Pieck too. Mina is still waiting that new pair of lungs, her treatment is going well." Annie took a small break before continuing: "Ymir's condition's worsened, but she won't show. They're still looking for a match for her. Connie is doing fine." 

She glanced at the stone, her eyes narrowed for the slightest bit. "I'm not sure you've met Krista and Marco. They got at Saint Maria a few weeks after the incident and stayed for a while. They're better now." 

She took a handful of snow and placed it on her cheek, which had started aching again. 

"My father showed up earlier," she muttered. "I think I just lost any chance to reconnect with him." 

The blonde stared at her friend's stone, speechless for a second, somehow hoping it would talk back. She could almost hear his hoarse and quite low voice. 

"Maybe you were right," she murmured, recalling his advice from back then. "Maybe I really am better off without him." 

Annie clenched her teeth and hugged herself once more, slightly bending down. 

"I wish you were still here, Berthold," she said, clinging to his hoodie's soft fabric, tears starting to form in the corners of her eyes. It was the only thing she had from him, the last of his warmth. "I wish you could see us."

***

The sun was starting to set and the clouds looked like they were about to break. 

Porco made his way out of the empty cemetery, his head down and eyebrows furrowed. He dreaded that place with all his being, but he had to pay his respects, at least on his brother's birthday. 

The cold was starting to get him, so he attempted to tighten his jacket around him. 

Porco was about to turn left so he could avoid another familiar stone. Just then, he saw her.

***

The buzz of a phone slapped everyone out of their thoughts. Pieck was quick to take it from the nightstand, her eyebrows furrowing when she saw the notification. 

_Text from Pokko._


End file.
